Elliott

AP Bio

[Elliott @0xEliott]

In 2015 someone told me to buy 1 Ethereum for $4. I said no.

And I’m so glad, because today I bought 1 Ethereum worth $4700.

Would I rather own $4 worth of Eth or $4700 worth of Eth? Pretty obvious.

Patience is key.

[Elliott @0xEliott]

On the fence about cutting the grass today in 95° heat. Very six-seven.

[Elliott @0xEliott]

Shout out to those making it all day without a nap, pulled an all dayer, outstanding work

[Elliott @0xEliott]

What’s your favorite background for meetings where you have to turn your camera on? I’ll go first:

[Elliott @0xEliott]

Excited to announce I’m now open to work after an incredible journey with the World Cup, where I had the privilege of spearheading development of our next-gen Ultra-Wideband match ball sensor platform, driving innovation & delivering real-time ball tracking throughout the tourney

[Elliott @0xEliott]

Someone left a cooler with ice and a block of cheddar by my desk after the 4th of July cookout, found it 5 days later and the smell would knock a buzzard off a shit wagon

[Elliott @0xEliott]

Haaland doesn’t play for Holland?
Nor-wayyy..

[Elliott @0xEliott]

2 tips in this heat:

1. Drink lots of water
2. Watch how you fucking talk to me

[Elliott @0xEliott]

Trump just asked where Bosnia is on a map after that red card.

[Elliott @0xEliott]

If I had a tool that sucked up my garbage, then compressed it into an infinitesimally small speck, then I had magic gloves that could carry the speck, and I dropped it in the grass, how deep would it drop into the ground?

[Elliott @0xEliott]

All these soccer players faking injuries.. you want to know real pain? Try gout

[Elliott @0xEliott]

They should let fans keep the soccer ball if they catch it in the stands

[Elliott @0xEliott]

Am I thinking what I’m thinking?

[Elliott @0xEliott]

Has anyone seen my W2 aha
Just trying to do my taxes b4 the deadline

[Elliott @0xEliott]

When is the next Pokemon center card release expected?

[Elliott @0xEliott]

“AI can do 85% of knowledge work”
THEN WHY AM I DOING MY TAXES

[Elliott @0xEliott]

I found an empty Pokémon tin.

Guess I finally pulled a Hollow Rare.

[Elliott @0xEliott]

When your eBay listing gets sold and you realize they charge 13.25% in fees and you offered to pay shipping.