Michael Cooper II

I’ve never fit inside boxes.

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

For the record:

1: Knicks
2: Spurs
3. Spurs
4. Knicks
5. Knicks
6. Knicks

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

People who hold up the line buying lottery tickets…

I really just want to tell them “YOU’RE NOT WINNING!”

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

Peach anything is better than regular.

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

That’s about $52k per snap for Micah Parsons over the next 4 years. Wow.

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

Remember when you used to be able to pump your gas and then go in and pay for it?

[⚜️Alan Thomas⚜️ @CardN_AL]

“How many times have you watched The Preakness finish”

Me

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

I hate Sam’s Club.

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

I think every toilet should have a slow release lid.

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

“Quit waitin’ for someone to care about your life and go write you an autobiography.”

@ahagazelle

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

I just realized they said “automo’ bills”

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

My time is infinitely more important than my money, and it’s not close. So I’ll cash app you something before I’ll dedicate time to come to your event. But if I do show up, you are either really important to me OR my wife wanted to go.

And chances are it’s not the latter.

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

There is so much power to be had by creating and sustaining a perpetual victim class.

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

The only downside about spending time with my parents? The news.

I absolutely hate the news.

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

@JSmiddy_LIE ✊🏾✊🏾

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

Anyone else feel low-key relieved when you hit a red light on the way to the gym? I don’t even mind getting caught by a train.

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

@JSmiddy_LIE Killin me

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

@JSmiddy_LIE 😂😂taking every detour

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

There’s never really a gray-area.

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

If people you allow people to depend on you for anything, show up for them.

[Michael Cooper II @2coop20]

It be the discount people that give you the biggest headaches.

Moral of the story: don’t give discounts.