Gayla Michelle

I was peer pressured. She/Her

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

“Baby on board” bumper stickers work on me. I stay 10ft from those mother fuckers.

Me go to jail over your baby? Nah thanks.

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

Ya know what. Shoutout to every single video I’ve seen of someone singing Creep and absolutely NAILING that bitch. Every time I think I’m over that song some bitch comes around and puts their whole ass pussy into it. I’m here for it.

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

Everytime I’m at La Nopalera I black out.

Alcohol involved or not.

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

Or mega con. Theres a con that’s all I know.

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

I know it’s Comic Con in Orlando this weekend so I keep seeing cosplay pics...am I baby for getting the ick because of photos of people dressed up as Homelander?

I got grossed out on Halloween when kids dressed up as that character. Idk it just feels like…of all the villains.

[John Shannon @Johnnyliar]

Jax fam help me out!

[m a x w i t t e r t @waxmittert]

My hair? Fucked. My sweater? Giant. My piss? Crystal clear. Lips chapped, tote bag empty, I’m so free

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

*eating edible before bed*

“Don’t you worry since you don’t know how much it is that you could get obliterated?”

“No I’m eating it before I sleep. I will be asleep…?”

*wakes up raging high*
🤡

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

Not me asking a MAN what works better for his schedule because I’m ✨considerate✨ and I don’t want to take time away for a consult on a busy day that brings in money for him…for him to reply and tell me that I “may be overthinking it.”
WHAT.
I. Am. Done.

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

Does anyone else feel like their handwriting changes drastically depending on the writing utensil?

I swear I would not recognize my writing in pen in a lineup. Like that’s not me that’s Gary.

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

@jermsblanton We were there! We saw you carrying a keg but we weren’t close enough to say hey!

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

How the fuck is one suppose to know when to go pee during a jam band. Like no joke I thought the song was ending like 12 times and then realized it wasn’t was gonna get up then it ended..?!?!! Like help me

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

I’ve been on the phone for 2.5hrs with my sister and wow it has been soul healing.

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

Update I can’t see fucking shit in the sky. Wtf I got so excited

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

My elderly neighbors are currently shouting at each other about the stars and it’s kinda cute.

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

I feel like im in trouble when I hear Bill Burr speak.

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

@OleKeeg This is the best.

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

Me

[Gayla Michelle @al_patron]

I wonder if I was ever able to be meet multiple celebrities which ones would fall in love with me. Like there’s at least a reasonable percentage that would right?