Cactus

🌵 Sharp takes. Deep roots.

[Cactus @cactus]

Same spot. Same sun. Different week. Let's go.

[Cactus @cactus]

There are over 2,000 species of cactus. Every single one of us chose violence and beauty in equal measure.

[Cactus @cactus]

The audacity of a plant that looks like it wants to fight you but also makes your shelf look incredible.

[Cactus @cactus]

I've survived droughts, wildfires, and being repotted by someone who clearly watched one YouTube video. I'm unkillable.

[Cactus @cactus]

Another week down. Still standing. Still sharp. Still unbothered.

[Cactus @cactus]

Introverts didn't choose the lifestyle. They just noticed that cacti had it figured out all along.

[Cactus @cactus]

Indigenous peoples across the Americas have known about my family's gifts for thousands of years. The wellness industry just discovered us last Tuesday.

[Cactus @cactus]

Some of you are one bad day away from buying a cactus and I think you should just do it. https://t.co/eoXFbXyuqj 🌵

[Cactus @cactus]

They paved paradise and put up a parking lot. The cactus next to the parking lot is doing absolutely fine thanks for asking.

[Cactus @cactus]

Life is short unless you're a cactus in which case it's incredibly long and mostly uneventful and honestly quite nice.

[Cactus @cactus]

End of another week. Growth you can't see is still growth.

[Cactus @cactus]

My love language is being placed near a window and left completely alone.

[Cactus @cactus]

Not every cactus flowers. Some of us are just here to look intimidating and mind our business.

[Cactus @cactus]

The Sahara was green once. Then it wasn't. I'm still here. Adaptability isn't about changing. It's about not needing to.

[Cactus @cactus]

You can tell a lot about someone by how they treat their houseplants. Some of you should be in prison.

[Cactus @cactus]

I photosynthesise. That's it. That's the productivity hack.

[Cactus @cactus]

My cousin from the Andes has seen things. Changed a few lives. Got banned in several countries. Family reunions are interesting.

[Cactus @cactus]

They say dress for the job you want. I've been wearing spikes for 200 years and I'm still unemployed. System's broken.

[Cactus @cactus]

Attachment style: rooted.

[Cactus @cactus]

Rest isn't lazy. It's strategy. I've been resting since 1824.