Miss Champagne

You don't become a hero by being normal.

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

I'm baaaaack. I've had enough of fb drama. I can post whatever I want on here :)

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

Happy Mother's Day to the best mother alive. #happymothersday #myworld #iloveyoumom http://t.co/FZ1YLOeMXJ

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

Pumpkin Queen #halloween #jackskellington #birthdaygirl http://t.co/CUqsc7hYxU

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

@teletoonatnight . I love the new season of Archer. Almost as much as you Fred :)

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

"You're not Miss Piggy, you're Glenda the good Witch." - Community.
That was a reference I should have known.

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

Why bother with friends when I have wine and Netflix?

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

What do u do on a Tuesday when u are 25 , with no husband and no kids?

Get drunk, and high and watch adult cartoons.

Life is good.

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

"Karate? The Dane Cook of martial arts!?". - Archer.
Haha this for my favourite follower ;) @TheIronSherk

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

@teletoonatnight I don't care which night you're on. I'm watching Fred and being jealous about his tattoos. And loving the shows Xo

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

Iove serious commercials where guys wear tupees. Cause I'm not listening to a word you're saying. I'm just looking at your tupee

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

K Ben Afleck, you tried to be a super heroe once, and failed. Why are you going to ruin a perfectly good one to try again?

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

You know why its called Twitter? Because all the people on it are TWITS. Just saying.

[𝙲𝚘𝚜𝚖𝚘𝚜 @observedcosmos]

Don't fuck with me in the mornings.

[𝙲𝚘𝚜𝚖𝚘𝚜 @observedcosmos]

Yelling ''STAY!''at a non-living object that keeps falling over as if it's going to listen to you.

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

Ah shit. Another get drunk without realizing it kinda night.... Alone.. dammit.

[Shit Liquor Says™ @ShitLiquorSays]

You're bangable not dateable, know the difference

[The Alicianater @leechee420]

The best thing about being single is hearing about all of the casual sex I could be having, and then eating nachos in bed instead.

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

You know you're comfortable with someone when you just nonchalantly pick your nose in front of them....

[Naazihah @naazihah]

You think your bra is unsupportive? Try spending an hour with my mother.

[Miss Champagne @DamagedToy]

Been eating really well lately....

Thanks dad for buying me groceries and trying to make me fat and unattractive to all men.