fakejohnpiper

Christian hedonist. God is most glorified in me when I am most Calvinist in him. I brings the gospel hard core, yo.

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

All you sports-olaters frittering your time away give King Jesus "March Sadness."

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

@AndyDollahite @StephenDauphin Watch your mouth

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

More like SINstagram. #amiright

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

There may not be marriage in heaven but I will be there still tweeting confusing things.

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

Even though I'm from Minneapolis, I don't approve @jdgreear's tribute to Prince. https://t.co/v2U7KM6OfJ

[Jonathan Howe @Jonathan_Howe]

SEBTS rocking the seminary lunch. https://t.co/KDgqSEOlw2

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

JOURNAL ENTRY: Not being a pastor is tough. Extreme urge to start seashell collection. Must fight for joy.

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

You can download my upcoming book on extra-masculine dudeness at a discount using our special "bro-mocode."

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

TGC moving to Indianapolis in 2017. I hope they have a Sbarro's.

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

If you're the sort of idolater who takes vacations, may we suggest the Desiring God Theme Park? http://t.co/YEW9jf9vsW

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

Gonna need each of you to sow one small seed so I can rent a car to drive down and smack Creflo Dollar.

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

Don't be a Halloweener.

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

If you say money doesn't grow on trees, some people will tie money to trees when you're not looking & ... Wait. What was I talking about?

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

Dinner's ready. Thanks, friends. You have been a sanctifying burden. We won't do it again next year.

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

@steverahn Diet Coke at 9 p.m. One last head-pat for the labradoodle. Bed by 9:05.

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

@Superunkn_wn Even before the gambling, you have erred. Bowling is a frivolous use of time.

[Year Round Bronco Fan @ButtFumblerr]

@fakejohnpiper Is it wrong to take homeless people bowling and gamble on which one is going to win? #afpj

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

@mrmedders Very cute. Listen: Do you know that cute is deadly to a church? Are you a cute pastor, Jeff Medders? Are you killing your church?

[J. A. Medders @drmedders]

@fakejohnpiper do you plan to write any books about God’s glory? Ever? #askfpj

[fakejohnpiper @fakejohnpiper]

@ZachLucPicard Three. One to invite someone to screw the lightbulb. One to come forward and do it. And another to see his hand.