Valori Boss

Will it be warm?

[James Fell @BodyForWife]

On Boston's "Straight Pride Parade."

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

Little bro tried caviar tonight and said, “oh, they’re like adult pop rocks”

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

Haven’t tweeted in almost a year. Is this a bad tweet?

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

Twitter's great cause I forget about it for weeks on end, then I remember and it's like a surprise collection of all my friends funniest stuff they've been saying and doing without me.

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

@saranderson Target! It's where I get mine, from the men's section.

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

Trying to decide which lightbulb to purchase like it's the biggest and hardest decision of my life💡

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

@grizkidd @errrands_ They got me real good

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

A small pile of lipsticks had accumulated on my dresser. Decided to put em away in the lipstick drawer. There were 25. On the dresser. Oops.

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

@annajube @s_en_y Alberto's misses you too Anna. He told me.

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

@rbruggem @errrands_ Oh this tiny Tabasco bottle? #actuallyroswelltvshowfannottacobell

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

Sunscreen: $10
Travel shampoo: $3
Flight to New Mexico: $208
Starting your period the day you leave on vacation: priceless

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

Military homecoming videos got nothin on videos of colorblind people seeing color for the first time. I will bawl every time. Can't deal.

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

Over-air-conditioning ruining my summer since summertime and air conditioning 😡

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

Nickelback song came on the radio & the station was cutting in & out w/ another station which was playing ANOTHER NICKELBACK SONG! #blessed

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

@s_en_y Really? Just?

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

@HeavyMids I have never pulled a shirt off by the collar in my whole 33 years of life.

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

PSA: it's Handmaid's not Handmaiden's. Thank you.

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

Yeah, it's just lightly snowing as I walk home on May 17th so just kill me now and everything will be ok😵

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

@rbruggem All the time

[Valori Boss @gaudyoctopus]

@carjug I know zero Brian's!