Sir Jake Martini

Writing films that'll never be made and burning bridges before I get to them. I'm probably thinking about bread.

[Sir Jake Martini @JFDmartini]

Told Bri that her hash brown had been accidentally thrown away. Her response:

[Lachie🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇳🇿 @LachlanBates6]

Fulham:

[The Great Sage, PhD @ShriekingNoises]

Oh good it’s actually a downward spiral

[AskAubry 🦋 🐆🦝 @ask_aubry]

Omg Pride and Prejudice.

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

You can’t just convert a non-profit into a for-profit. That is illegal.

[Hope @TheGhostOfHope]

This would go crazy on 1940s German twitter

[Varun Khurana @varunkhurana99]

Your company’s highest paid engineer showing up to meetings

[Karl @cafills]

old testament looking ass bread

[You Yeltz! @YouYeltz]

A through ball so good it killed a defender

[Keara Sullivan @superkeara]

Me subtly trying to meet the bartender’s eye so they see I’m waiting politely and patiently and should let me order next

[hitdizzle @hitdvm]

4 year old me watching Pingu:

[Guillermo del Toro @RealGDT]

What few people know or notice is that the iron bar shadows are spray painted: a b&w film trick that is used effectively here.

[Iowa Chill @IowaChill]

Stolen valor

[Kalshi Football @KalshiFB]

Girls can love Ryan Gosling all they want, but don't forget that he was an absolute liability at cornerback in Remember the Titans.

[Brian Roemmele @BrianRoemmele]

The Learned Helplessness Experiment was a part of most High Schools in the 1980s. It is no longer taught on any scale.

[the thicc husband & father @lukeisamazing]

I guess if you think sports exist solely as a means of exporting American imperial propaganda, sure. meanwhile, for normal people, this exists

[NO CONTEXT HUMANS @HumansNoContext]

Why is this so perfectly made 🤣

[kira 👾 @kirawontmiss]

this got me crying😭😭

[ali @alibrooke4ever]

This was even funnier than I thought it could be