Matt R.

Ohayou Gozaimasu

[Kenny Powers @IamKennyPowers]

Kenny can't type. He calls and yells commands at me. He says for you all to fucking follow him cause he's got shit to say!!

[Batman @Cause_IamBatman]

You don't know the difference between your and you're? YOUR punishment must be more severe!

[Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien]

I was surfing the internet yesterday, when I was struck with a horrible vision of our future: http://t.co/mhdze8EtGp

[merpins @merpmerpinsVT]

I don't care what anyone says, I like the Titanic. My favorite character was the iceberg.

[merpins @merpmerpinsVT]

When the Dragon Ball franchise went into its sabbatical, Krillin found work as a little boy named Omi on a show called "Shaolin Showdown."

[merpins @merpmerpinsVT]

My tweets aren't for everyone. If you don't like them, try pulling up a chair. You're going to have to wait a long time for me to care.

[merpins @merpmerpinsVT]

The moon was destroyed by the Namekian. What you are seeing is a Death Star.

[Trip Glitch Club | Life & Travel Hacks ✈️ @tripglitchclub]

At the end of job interviews, if asked:

"Do you have any questions?"

Reply: Yes, Is there anything about my application that concerns you?