Nick Carson

Texan, living in Oklahoma.

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

It's truly impressive how often the downtown Tulsa @HomeDepot manages to find new ways to to not meet my very low expectations.

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

@HeartWerkDJ @dearmothica Anxiously awaiting this content.

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

Yeah, this restroom smells like the men's room at @themerc_tulsa

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

@HeartWerkDJ Most Americans don't really recognize other countries, much less know about them.

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

It always cracks me up when Okies are confused by the phrase "I don't really eat bologna"

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

@MikeHunterJr100 @natecrane @drivebytruckers Has anyone ever called them country music?

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

I finally made 40.

And still wearing jeans.

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

@HeartWerkDJ @TulsaFire

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

You don't go to @wingstop for the service.

Just sat and stared at a couple of bags for 20 minutes.

When I asked her to double check she told me "I just put em there, was about to call your name."

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

@1bigguy1 @JimGloverChevy Are you sure they were talking about something the car owns?

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

I believe in two different trinities.

Sliced brisket, smoked sausage, & spare ribs.

Onions, bell pepper, & celery.

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

They say rock and roll will kill you.

But tell me babe, what happens if it don't?

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

According to @Reuters not everyone can afford the down-payment on a $1,000,000,000 apartment.

Just in case you were unaware.

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

@DanSmit27845702 @TylerMahanCoe Did you miss the Talking Heads episode while you were at your job?

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

Lady- *stepping in front of me* "I don't know where to get in the line."

Me- "I guess the end, it's back there."

Lady- "I'll go ask customer service."

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

Yes.

[Tyler Mahan Coe (chaotic good) @TylerMahanCoe]

Which song is sadder?

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

How many pounds can I bench press?

Well, how much does a transmission weigh?

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

Mel- Alexa, set a timer for 9 minutes.

Alexa- Setting timer for 10 minutes.

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

@P1gswillfly My name is Texas, and I approve this message.

[Nick Carson @NECarson]

@HeartWerkDJ Call me old fashioned, but I like my donuts to be mostly donut.