𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏

tattooer/trashmouth/cat mom/sports goth. proudly rep @rungoodgear. I like baseball.

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

Girl I’ve been pissed off all day

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

Imagine cheating on Megan thee stallion like bro wtf are you doing

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

She’s literally Megan THEE stallion

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

Starting on chapter 10, and we’re at 34,500 words

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

I’m writing a book and I’m on chapter 8 and I already have 28,581 words bro how many words are novels supposed to have

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

I DIDNT GO TO COLLEGE I DONT KNOW WHAT IM DOING

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

Omg someone in the Rockies crowd just chanted let’s go Brandon lmao what a fucking loser is it 2022?????

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

Me: gets semi-mild food poisoning plus migraine accompanying it at 2:30 am, barely sleeps, has some tummy issues and gnarly headache
Noon appointment: refuses to reschedule

I honestly hope I barf on her

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

@Stapes I asked her to ask for Xbox money and I’d give her $100 for her service ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

One of the hot 20-somethings that works with me posted a sweater that she wanted to her ig story and someone sent the money for her to buy it
I (me a not hot 39 year old lady) posted asking for Venmo for a switch 2 or Xbox one and crickets

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

But if someone wants to send me money for an Xbox one so I can play fable or money for a switch 2 so I can play windwaker I’d be stoked and show my feet or something (I have cute feet and they’re not worth less than $400 tbh)

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

Moral of the story is 1. Be hot and 2. If you’re hot scam men on the internet and 3. Don’t ask for money if you’re old and not hot

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

Love u Chicago

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

Overheard downtown Chicago:
Girl one, walking: yeah you pretty
Girl two, walking the opposite way: yeah you pretty too

I love girls

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

Having fun at the Chicago art museum (openly weeping at the monet collection)

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

USA team auraless

[Mike @hammerito]

I don't follow NBA a ton but shoutout to Bam Margera man

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

@GordonBombayObv Are we crying or WHAT

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

So we’re all in on DR for this series right? 🥲

[𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝑏 @OhDagEmily]

@GordonBombayObv That’s why we’re all in on DR

[Blooper @BlooperBraves]

times like this you just gotta hang your head and admit the espresso machine in the dugout is pretty cool