𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽

Unlicensed critic at author of WORM ON A HOOK, Seagalogy, Niketown. (

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

I am the only candidate in this race who has reviewed every single TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE movie at least once

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

I'll have my review of TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (no THE) (2022) ready on Monday, but until then here's a thread of my reviews for the entire franchise.

THE TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE (1974) is, on certain days, my favorite movie.
https://t.co/LkguU85pMZ

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

No judgment of anybody else but I feel gross posting here with the nazi owner stealing from the poor and shit. I'll keep the account open in case he gets eaten by an alligator but for my new reviews check https://t.co/MDNu1d6wW0 or the blue place. Thanks for the good times, pals!

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

Happy to say I kinda liked HELLBOY: THE CROOKED MAN. The production values are shoddy compared to previous HELLBOYs, but it's more in the vein of the comics, with Hellboy stumbling into a down and dirty Appalachian folk horror tale.
https://t.co/eca29zyB2h

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

John Waters' DESPERATE LIVING (1977) is set in a town made of junk where outcasts go to start over. At the end they overthrow the fascist buffoon who has been tormenting them and making everything so stupid, so it's a warm tale for our times.
https://t.co/lyJNJTq2vr

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

In THE CHRISTMAS SPIRIT (2023) a guilt-ridden man is haunted by the embodiment of the true meaning of Christmas, who appears to him as his favorite wrestler, and wants him to perform a human sacrifice? Hard to explain.
https://t.co/1xBDhsDEQj

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

Jack Nance

is...

ERASERHEAD

I hadn't seen this since I was pretty young, but it turns out I still like it.

https://t.co/TEZRNBJ9RJ

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

You know how it is: sometimes you're too uptight, so you call a 976 number tosummon an inter-dimensional goblin and learn how to party. FRANKIE FREAKO is PSYCHO GOREMAN writer/director Steven Kostanski's contribution to the little rubber puppets genre.
https://t.co/20wdFml4xg

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

THELMA is a cute comedy where a 93 year old grandma played by June Squibb gets scammed, wants justice and starts acting like her life is an action movie. And Richard Roundtree came along for one last ride.
https://t.co/IJYEQSux6Q

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

The cozy, crackling fire is back for blood in ADULT SWIM YULE LOG 2: BRANCHIN' OUT, in which sole part 1 survivor Zoe attempts to escape into a Hallmark Channel holiday rom-com. It's a totally different experience than the first one, but I loved it.
https://t.co/TvzhYkaAhq

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

@clubside @nathanrabin No, I'm a fan but I don't know him.

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

In STING (2024), an intelligent spider falls from space, becomes a little girl's pet, grows large and tries to eat everybody in the building. Set in NYC but it's an Australian production from Kiah-Roache Turner, director of the WYRMWOOD movies.
https://t.co/0Qol2qKqbi

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

I was intrigued by the idea of an anime movie about jazz musicians, so I watched BLUE PLANET (2023).
https://t.co/Q1Iv7s0rmB

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

SKINNED DEEP is a wild 2004 indie horror movie directed by makeup FX veteran Gabriel Bartalos. It reminded me at times of HOUSE OF 1,000 CORPSES, THE ROAD WARRIOR, TCSM2 and an amazing horror maze with a stunt show in the middle.
https://t.co/3bHjslo01D

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

I really liked NUTCRACKERS, a Christmas comedy in which jerky Ben Stiller is forced to look after orphan nephews and finds his heart. Being a David Gordon Green movie it's beautifully shot and built around a quartet of quirky non-actor brothers. (On Hulu.)
https://t.co/NDLOZpuHJK

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

FANTASTIC PLANET (1973) is a beautifully bizarre trip to an alien world where very enlightened and civilized beings see humans as pets, vermin, or terrorists. I love that it has plenty to say without being one straight forward allegory.
https://t.co/apDXeT15bl

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

Meka leka hi meka EVIL ho! Here's one long review of all three direct-to-video WISHMASTER sequels.

https://t.co/HMkYfZHb5w

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

Wish? Did somebody say wish? I was not a fan in 1997, or really in 2024, but I sort of got a kick out of revisiting the fantastical slasher WISHMASTER.
https://t.co/dl1qp9hPBz

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

@TheL1P It did! Read a little bit last night. Thanks!

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

Here I declare TRIGGER WARNING a "slightly above average for this sort of thing" b-action vehicle for Jessica Alba. Fairly generic, but with at least one really good fight, and she's cool in it. Not sure what they're going for with the title.
https://t.co/c2hktSo8tR

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

I really liked REZ BALL, the moving high-school-basketball-team-overcoming-tragedy drama from director Sydney Freeland and co-writer Sterlin Harjo (creator of Reservation Dogs). It's on Netflix.
https://t.co/IpnAhGTvNl

[𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙽 @outlawvern]

Today I review two horror movies where the main character is a wrestler: 2018's WRESTLEMASSACRE (wannabe wrestler loses it, goes on gory grappling rampage) and 2022's HERE FOR BLOOD (wrestler battles cult trying to sacrifice a kid he's babysitting).

https://t.co/nfkfKmexI1