Philip Tuesday

You know; tickin' over.

[John Fidler @johnfidler]

Here's "Paul Daniels" by The Colourdrops, a band I was in as a child. @noggsy87 and @matt_jaffa share the blame https://t.co/l7J0i0uHL0 RIP

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

There's a worm at the bottom of the garden, and his name is...

I forget.

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

Angels with Dirty Faeces @midnight #FilmPoops

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

The Stench Connection (with Poopeye Doyle). #FilmPoops @midnight

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

Scatman
#FilmPoops @midnight

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

I wouldn't piss on me if I was on on fire

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

Which hurts the most?

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

@PhilipTuesday Mishka Shubaly, so don't ask.

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

A song

Let's Raise A Glass https://t.co/nHfJo9XPqw

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

BREAKING:
Walsall man has flat battery.

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

Sunday.

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

One of my nipples has fallen off!

False alarm.
It's a cornflake.

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

Frankie Boyle, the funniest dinner lady at our school.

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

@PhilipTuesday ... Or, "Is that meant to be the fucking moon?"

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

@PhilipTuesday ... Or, why is the moon...

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

"Where's your spunk?", an American fitness instructor once asked me.
#TimesWhenMyAspergersGotMeIntoTrouble

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

There's a guy works down the chip shop who swears.

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

@ArcheryButts bravo

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

Of corset suits you John.

[Philip Tuesday @PhilipTuesday]

His name was Jesus. He was a showgirl.