chanel miller

[God @TheTweetOfGod]

Being gay is far less of a choice than being an asshole.

[Zac Galifianakis @ZacGalifianakis]

Isnt it strange how hot ppl are really just nice-looking arrangements of atoms like damn u have a sexy deoxyribonucleic acid arrangement

[Zac Galifianakis @ZacGalifianakis]

me: I'll just add 'haha' at the end so I don't sound mean

[George Takei @GeorgeTakei]

What's surprising is that anyone is surprised this guy has repugnant views. Isn't it a show about rednecks in Lou...

[Zac Galifianakis @ZacGalifianakis]

I put the hot in psychotic.

[The Dark Lord @Lord_Voldemort7]

#5ReasonsWhyCyberMondayRocks: there's no need to interact with people. People suck. #CyberMondayMadness #sp

[George Takei @GeorgeTakei]

#BreastCancerAwareness

[George Takei @GeorgeTakei]

Keep the Internet free--of grammatical errors.

[Zac Galifianakis @ZacGalifianakis]

Am I the only one who calculates how much sleep I can get before I go to bed?

[Zac Galifianakis @ZacGalifianakis]

I will respect any religion you practice...as long as you never knock on my door to tell me about it.

[George Takei @GeorgeTakei]

Your Friday earworm. No liking unless you think, "Boy, George, that was easy." (Subm by Stickey Von Ribz)

[George Takei @GeorgeTakei]

Let's be frank.
(Submitted by Pamela Daly)

[Zac Galifianakis @ZacGalifianakis]

Why is it acceptable for people to be idiots but not acceptable for me to point it out?

[George Takei @GeorgeTakei]

It's a hard Jabba, but someone's got to do him.

Oh myyy, did I just write that?

[Russell Brand @rustyrockets]

Too much fuckin perspective.

[George Takei @GeorgeTakei]

For your Monday. No likes/shares unless you get it right away. And NO giving it away in the comments, please. ...

[chanel miller @vates]

@patrickstump I've seen some of your tweets and I was wondering: how did you get to be so stinking awesome?

[chanel miller @vates]

@themindofturkey really? I never would have guessed that.