Not Your Lawyer

Veteran of the Chicken Sandwich Wars

[Not Your Lawyer @WFSquire]

Papa John said this in November 26, 2019

Five days later, a year ago today, the first person in the world fell ill from symptoms of COVID-19

What did Papa John know and when did he know it?

[John Coffee Hays @26thAndGuad]

They’re making AOC SEC edits on TikTok lmfao

[Three Year Letterman @3YearLetterman]

@FLOTUS The first amendment does not protect criticism of the president and his family during a time of a declared war

Kimmel has violated his constitutional oath of loyalty, and he must be arrested

[James Medlock @jdcmedlock]

Yea, I'm supportive of antitrust as a tool in the tool belt, but skeptical of it as a theory of everything. Small firms will always have a role, but I don't want to be a nation of small holder yeomen farmers. I'm a costco socialist: big firms, big unions, big government.

[Not Your Lawyer @WFSquire]

Dragonball Z does NOT pass the Bechdel Test

[Not Your Lawyer @WFSquire]

“Meme lord” is a modern one-for-one translation of “philosopher king”

[Not Your Lawyer @WFSquire]

However much we pay state reps, it’s too much. They should be paying me to get to do bullshit all day

[Everything Georgia @GAFollowers]

Georgia Rep. Eric Bell has introduced House Bill 1013 that would make lemon pepper the official state chicken wing flavor.

The bill would go to the Senate and then to the governor if passed.

[Not Your Lawyer @WFSquire]

The year is 2032 and I have been deported for drinking skim milk (too woke)

[the sprockler @EnjoyerOfWeezer]

@CollegeGameDay @PeteThamel Nick Saban: “your team is doing an incredible job winning the lines of scrimmage”
Mario Cristobal for some reason:

[Not Your Lawyer @WFSquire]

I apologize to Oklahoma for apparently cursing you

[Not Your Lawyer @WFSquire]

Why do we let these cupcake teams in the college football playoffs? Another blowout, just like we all expected!

[Skinny @skinnydawg10]

‘23: dawgs lose to bama by 3 & go from 1 to 6

‘25: dawgs beat bama by 21 & go from 3 to 3

[Three Year Letterman @3YearLetterman]

If Gunner Stockton is not in NYC for the Heisman Ceremony I will make January 6th look like a True Love Waits convention

[Three Year Letterman @3YearLetterman]

There isn’t a bigger patriot in college football

[Not Your Lawyer @WFSquire]

We need the publicly-owned streaming service, Steaming Dot Gov, and we need it now!

[RedditCFB @RedditCFB]

Auburn falls to 1-1 in home games in the last 130 years in which the visiting team from Georgia had trouble getting into town due to a vehicular related incident.

[Jack Trice Mafia @JackTriceMafia]

The SEC even dominates every other conference in hypothetical field storms 😤

[Not Your Lawyer @WFSquire]

When there is sufficient backlash, I will be appointed health and human services secretary as the anti-RFK. I’ll be introducing food coloring additives they haven’t even invented yet. Hope you like your jello that can glow in the dark

[Three Year Letterman @3YearLetterman]

As a Southern Baptist, I was raised not to trust Catholics or Convicts