Kevin Daniels

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#1101revises Your paper showed a clear understanding of the topics referenced and reasons as to why the show showed multiple effects. Add one more reference to the murder scenes that are done in a way to shock the reader.

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#1101revises Change your thesis statement to provide a clear representation of the papers intentions.

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#1101revises 1. Great job at making your points clear and concise. Everything had evidence backing it up.

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

but found myself out of my element and unresponsive to others.

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#NewAmericanChanges1101 I think the author has a hole in his argument by laying out the scenario as if the process of drinking wasn’t the users fault. He mentions the reader can easily be handed a cup with a liquid such as sprite that he thought was safe to drink. Shortly

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

realizing it was a mixed drink. My argument it court would simply be, I was handed a drink that seemed to be sprite, I do not drink often, never have. This clearly was a laced drink that as described in the paper can easily happen to anyone. I was unwilling to get drunk

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

That this is a normal situation which can take place any time. This allows the reader to dive deep into this example he gives. The writer moved away from run on sentences and improved his overall smoothness.

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#newamericanchanges1101 first off, his paper has completely changed. He remained using the personal tone of voice through the paper but made it more professional. Describing a scenario with more depth. This is a major change from 1-2. The writer elaborated more on his point

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

So the reader can process and swiftly move from paragraph to paragraph

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#NewImpression1101 Just based on the first two paragraphs I can see that this writer did not read his draft out loud. There are a lot of blocky points of the papaws that make it hard to read smoothly. The content he has is great but he needs to separate his sentences

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#1101Visits I went to the Grand Canyon and it was awesome, I plan on doing it again some time. Me and my family rafted down the river and got helicoptered out. Would 100% recommend it.

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#Checkyourtone1101 Revised:

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#Checkyourtone1101 original:

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#graduatedtone1101 with the change in music it feels more like a family scene. I didn’t take it as if he was a little crazier, defiantly doesn’t seem like an into to a movie anymore. I would say the tone is very laid back and relaxed.

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#graduatedtone1101 he is very laid back but also it seems like the beginning to a fast a furious movie or something. 7 nation army give it an intense tone, the pool shows he might have a lot of money.

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

@amandagshoup_ Seems like an eventful night🤔🤔

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#friendlytone1101 I had class yesterday morning and realized my car wouldn’t start. It’s all good though, I called progressive and had it towed to an auto-parts shop. It will be up and running soon!

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#friendlytone1101 I got to my car yesterday morning and the engine wouldn’t start, had to get it towed to an auto shop. Not the best morning.

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#1101Watches My favorite film released relatively recently is Once Upon A Time in Hollywood. Quintin Tarrantino worked his magic.

[Kevin Daniels @__KevinDaniels]

#TelevisedEvidence1101 it also makes the claim that shows such as Sponge-bob are a direct cause@for the attention deficit disorders we see in rising numbers in today’s age. The is the precursor argument to social media, these problems mentioned have only exponentially increased.