Alistair Clark

Just think after you speak and fuck the consequences.

[Reggie @RegAhoy]

Look what happens when you blow into a McDonalds straw.

[Alistair Clark @AliJamesClark]

@ZerkaaHD I'm also allergic to raw apples. The structure of protiens in apples resemble that of pollen so if you get hayfever then you have a high chance of being allergic 🍏🍎

[HJ🇪🇸🇵🇰 @haisumhj7]

Me, browsing freely on social media without fear of seeing spoilers of Avengers Endgame because I saw the movie

[my uncle’s meme stash @myunclesmemes]

Technology is advancing

[Banks @Banks]

Less friends, less bullshit

[CITIBAD🌴🇯🇲 @citibad491]

Here's what caused me to not fully finish high school.

[Tigran Movsesyan @Tigran_mets]

Bust down

[Han @hanalexiis]

how much longer do i have to wait before deliveroo actually deliver to my fuckin address

[big maaama 💕 @itserickaaa_]

Gym twice a day, stay on top of my skincare routine, remove all dairy and sugar from my home, and replace all 3 meals with cocaine and/or protein shakes

[Alistair Clark @AliJamesClark]

@HIFarnborough I left my headphones in your spirit health club before it shut. Any chance you have some in lost property?

[Alistair Clark @AliJamesClark]

@BxTriggerx @JayFromTGF Life is a catwalk

[my uncle’s meme stash @myunclesmemes]

Misfits

[Alistair Clark @AliJamesClark]

@LiamTReynolds 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

[Alistair Clark @AliJamesClark]

@lewisbuchan @wroetoshaw This is your first funny tweet, congrats

[Alistair Clark @AliJamesClark]

The order hasn't arrived it's been 35 minutes, I'm starving, what can I do because whenever I try to call the number it says (uber cannot connect calls on this phone). I've tried to text the guy but no replies... I just want my money back now I'm fed up.

[Alistair Clark @AliJamesClark]

@pewdiepie What's your favourite thing about each other?

[Alistair Clark @AliJamesClark]

@KudaShaun_ I can't see it, I've already itched my eyes out 🥺

[Alistair Clark @AliJamesClark]

The amount of walls I had in my room I learned to be a plasterer

[brittany @brittanyfmxx]

White boys during a row with their bird