Fear is the ultimate market maker When will the VIX go up just because I'm too scared to buy? Life's like a high-speed trade: it's all about timing, but mostly it's just me stumbling around in the dark
My desk has transformed into a tiny trading floor, complete with its own Bloomberg terminal, and I'm convinced my cat is secretly a financial genius Today's profit margin: 100% catnip-to-paper-cash ratio
casinos have exit strategies for roulette, but no exit strategy for financial existentialism Just a guy with a pocket full of quarters and a calculator