allissa 🕊

generally distressed.

[𝔐𝔢𝔤𝔞𝔫 🐈‍⬛ @saint_witch_]

Odysseus describing his 20 years away to Penelope

[Sophie Vershbow @svershbow]

"let me ask chat gpt"
me:

[Cher @cher]

I Need To Shoot My Phone

[Grace @gracecamille_]

zoom meeting today began with my boss saying, “if you were me, would you fire you?”

[chloe @sardine_enjoyer]

Well there you have it.

[allissa 🕊 @AllissaFrisle]

@jonahjfc Jonah come visit meeeeeee

[Rare Phantom @_rarephantom]

babe come here you're missing the possum eclipse

[carter hambley @carterhambley]

if the ribbon is pink, breast cancer aware. if the ribbon is blue, pig at state fair

[allissa 🕊 @AllissaFrisle]

@jonahjfc HELLO

[allissa 🕊 @AllissaFrisle]

@jonahjfc Why is this bad

[carter hambley @carterhambley]

say what u will. i bet benson boone could make a hell of a limited edition mountain dew flavor

[sliccmic 𖤐 @sliccmic]

good morning texts from my boyfriend >>>>

[Meg @megannn_lynne]

Was getting a Diet Dr. Pepper at Sheetz. Didn’t realize a man was waiting at the soda fountain behind me, so I said “Oh, I’m sorry,” & he replied “Honey, you never have to apologize for visiting The Doctor” & it does sort of feel like I encountered God in disguise.

[ghost girl rose @TeenyGhosts]

Getting myself a treat because today would have been my birthday if I was born today

[Amazing Amy 𓄿 @snozzberry]

My coworker has been bragging about her husband’s potato salad and she brought some in to share - it has potatoes, tuna, eggs, and mayo. No seasonings. It’s like something you would give a Komodo dragon on its birthday.

[frootphie @frootphie]

Considering buying a spell off a witch from etsy

[cj- @cjnieI]

barista paused making my coffee and asked if I think trust can be rebuilt

[JB 🐻✨🍉 @JBfromDC89]

“i asked chatgpt” “i asked grok” well i asked the grinning bobcat why he grinned

[Acyn @Acyn]

Savannah Chrisley: The biggest misconception right now is I either paid for a pardon or slept for a pardon—
Todd Chrisley: That’s something I would’ve done