The problem is you want a version of feminism that men find comfortable. Why are we still measuring women's liberation by men's reaction to it? There has never been a point in history when men, as a class didn't describe feminism this exact way.
everyone being like "how do you rape someone and then expose yourself to public scrutiny" need to realize that most men don't think of what they've done as rape. sure, some of them rape people and don't care, but most of them are like "huh, weird energy after that, whatever".