John Doe

Gud frndz r lyk BUTT CHEEKS,SHIT cumz inbtw em bt they still STICK

[CHUKS 🍥 @ChuksEricE]

JUST IN:

Kidn@ppers return corpse of abducted farmer after collecting N56m ransom from his family

Bandits operating along the Kaduna-Abuja highway have k!ll£d a farmer identified as Ibrahim Kadafa, popularly known as Ibro, after he was kidnapped alongside his friend, Mustapha Shelpidi, while harvesting soybeans on his farm around Alheri Camp, Kilometer 30, along the Kaduna-Abuja road, on October 28, 2026.

Silverbird TV reports that Ibrahim, who worked in Abuja, had reportedly travelled to supervise his farm when the armed men struck and whisked both men away.

According to family sources, the kidn@ppers initially demanded a ransom of N100 million which was later reduced to N80 million. The family source said that after weeks of desperate negotiations, the family paid N56 million alongside three brand-new Samsung mobile phones and a recharge card worth N20, 000, in the hope of securing Ibrahim’s release.

The report states that what should have been a moment of reunion turned into a devastating tragedy. The family says that when they went to receive Ibrahim after meeting the kidnappers’ demands, they were handed his lifeless body, which was returned on Wednesday, November 11. The family also disclosed that Ibrahim had reportedly sustained a gunshot injury to his leg while attempting to escape during the abduction and remained without medical attention throughout his two weeks in captivity. The family source says they suspect complications from the untreated injury may have contributed to his de@th.

[The Football Era @Footballera0]

— Klopp’s world-beater team had more 3rd and 4th-place finishes combined than top-two finishes, btw.

— Arteta’s team, which apparently consists of shit players, has 4 top-two finishes and is about to make it 5 this season.

— Arteta’s shit team finished ahead of the same Klopp world-beater team twice.

— Arteta’s shit team is about to win back-to-back Premier League titles, something Klopp’s super team never managed.

— Arteta’s shit team and Klopp’s world-beater team have both beaten Pep to the title once.

— Arteta’s shit team finished runner-up to Pep three times, while Klopp’s world-beaters managed it twice.

So it’s safe to say Arteta has performed better with a worse team than Klopp did with a superteam. 👍

[Perfumes & Tees | Wabbitzbrand @ChidiThelma]

How far??

[Nizam Aliyu @Aliyu_Nizam]

The Funny Moment Tinubu forget he has been President and campaigned as a first time candidate.

The Head of this Pharoah and his gang of thieves nor really correct.

I just confirm am now

[John Doe @AnasJoomary]

@bi_benard_ Shouting at the Camera doesn't mean you knew what you were saying. Arteta only MISSED OUT OF THE CHAMPIONS LEAGUE for two seasons. Always put in a disclaimer at the start of your videos that "You're just a content creator and not an analyst".

[Bruno G. @afc_sk14]

Dermot Gallagher watched two almost identical incidents and somehow came to two completely different conclusions.

[A.Y.O @YusufAsunmogejo]

I think they just recruited you because this is the first time I am seeing your account. As usual, you already exposed yourself in two seconds.

Just take a look at your copy-and-paste job: you typed "(Quran 14}" with a broken bracket when the inheritance verses are in Surah An-Nisa (Chapter 4:11 to 12 and 4:176), not Chapter 14. It shows you don’t know what you are doing.

But for the sake of Muslims and bystanders, let me enlighten you.

The bone of contention is: A woman dies leaving a husband (1/2, which is 3/6), a mother (1/6), and two sisters (2/3, which is 4/6). When you add, those numerators (3 + 1 + 4) add up to 8 parts over a base of 6, which is 4/3. 

Why does a conditional legal code assign fixed fractional weights that sometimes add up above 1 (Awl) and sometimes add up below 1 (Radd)?

Because the Quran is laying out general statutory claim weights across infinite family combinations. The Quran is not writing a single static receipt for one family.

The Quran is making a universal legal rule where every single heir's share depends on who else is alive in the room. This means those fractions operate as relative weights rather than isolated slices of one fixed pie.

This right here is the basic part you people never understand. And I do not even blame you, because when your whole mission is hunting for faults in the Quran, your brain shuts off and you stop thinking critically. 

Every legal and financial system on earth works this way. In estate law and bankruptcy liquidation, if someone dies leaving $60,000 and three statutory claimants hold valid claims of $30,000 (1/2), $10,000 (1/6), and $40,000 (2/3) which totals $80,000, nobody on the surface of the earth will scream that the law forgot how to count.

Every court applies pro-rata abatement: you keep the statutory ratio between the heirs intact (3 : 1 : 4) and divide the estate into 8 equal shares instead of 6, giving them 3/8, 1/8, and 4/8 (1/2). 

This is the basic thing you and your ilk have failed to understand all this while. Or do you think if there was a genuine mistake in this verse, it is you in 2026 with a copy-pasted tweet that would discover it?

For over 1,400 years, sworn enemies of Islam who mastered classical Arabic, Jewish and Christian scholars living right beside the Muslims, and brilliant mathematicians combed through every single letter of the Quran looking for a crack to bring it down, and none of them could fault this system. It’s better you know your limit. There is a limit to propaganda.

Again, just like Ashkan on Saturday, calling Awl an "outside correction" invented because Allah missed the math is historically and mathematically ignorant.

Funny enough, that second column on your own table labeled "The Accurate Share" (3/8, 1/8, 1/2) IS OUR ISLAMIC AWL calculation that you copied and tried to weaponize against us without knowing how ratios work!

Cutting only the sisters' share or only the husband's share randomly, the way ignorant critics expect a static list to work, is what would violate Allah's word.

When Umar ibn al-Khattabconsulted the Companions, including Al-Abbas and Zayd ibn Thabit, they applied the same Quranic principle already used when unpaid debts exceed a dead person's estate.

Scaling the denominator from 6 to 8 preserves every heir's Quranic weight relative to one another without cheating anyone.

Did you also know that solving Islamic inheritance fractions (Ilm al-Fara'id) is what pushed Muhammad ibn Musa al-Khwarizmi to write the foundational book of Algebra, dedicating half the book to inheritance math?

Wait: Do you even have a fraction of this legal precision anywhere in your own book?

People whose scripture gave women zero guaranteed inheritance alongside brothers, and who threw their own religious laws in the dustbin centuries ago to subject their families and estates to the whims of secular British law, now want to lecture Muslims on divine jurisprudence. lol 😂

Allah knows best.

[Yusuf Tukur, PhD @realYusufTukur]

This is APC @OfficialAPCNg Chairman, Nentawe @nentawe1, lying blatantly that Kaduna State has never had a Cabinet Minister who was a Christian before Chris Musa.
That’s a dumb lie from the pit of hell. Bola @officialABAT and all those around him lie without shame.

El-Rufai @elrufai is the first Muslim Minister from Kaduna State since 1999.
So, a whole APC Chairman doesn’t know Isaiah Balat, Esther Nenadi who were very famous?

From 1999 to date, Kaduna has had 11 Ministers, 7 of whom were Christians and only 4 were Muslims.

These guys are very dangerous religious bigots.

@ishakaa
@uchediala
@SamuelOmogor
@abuuba22
@ShehunGwandu
@ThatIsokoLawyer
@SoprialaMembere
@jaymilayusuf
@ana_herleemerh
@AhmadSanda_
@dawisu
@Engr_Nadama

[Laura Vater, MD, MPH @doclauravater]

The longer I practice medicine, the more I realize how quickly life can change. We are all one phone call, one diagnosis from a different life.

[Nigerian News @Nigerians_New]

Oh my God! 😭 People are still trapped in the terrible traffic on the Abuja–Kaduna highway.

We took the risky decision to escape through the bush, and that decision may have saved us. Otherwise, we might still be stuck there.

May Allah bring everyone home safely. 🤲

[Siiuuu @itwas_a_gudday]

Eden Hazard is the most overrated footballer in history.

The only reason he had that much hype was because of 2 things...

1. He came from a country that doesn't really have enough history in football, so it's easy for him to be in conversations of their greatest ever players.

2. Chelsea aren't known to have skillful players or crazy dribblers which is his only ability, so, it wowed a lot of Chelsea fans. Check Chelsea's history, only Zola and maybe Joe Cole were a bit skillful, the club isn't known for all that flair, they are known to have mentality monsters like Drogba, Lampard, Ballsck instead.

If Hazard played for Barcelona, Madrid or Manchester United that have witnessed Maradona, Neymar, Messi, Cryuff, Ronaldinho, Guti, R9, Figo, Zidane, Charlton, Best, Ronaldo, Giggs, he wouldn't be rated that much at all.

Eden Hazard, an attacker was a big time Champions League flop who had just 10 goals which about 8 were penalties.

His best season was when Conte played him as a false 9 around 2018 or 2019

Aside from the Premier League, he only has 3 notable games in his career...

- 2018 World Cup quarter final against Brazil
- 2018/2019 Champions League away group stage against Atletico Madrid
- 2019 Europa League final against Arsenal.

There's literally no reason to ever glaze that dribbling merchant.

[Abu Amir @SadiqMaunde]

Borno state has 10 HoR members, 50X10= N500 million.

28 HoA members, 20X28= N560 million.

Total= N1.060 billion.

Before joining politics, Betara was a nobody. Today, he is the Chairman, house committee on appropriations.

This is happening in the same Nigeria that one idiot went to a podcast & referred to as a poor nation, & that the biggest problem of Nigeria is revenue generation, not corruption.

Proper idiot!

[Aliyu Mustapha @Sir_elmusty]

As I wrote last weekend:
"Every car being flaunted, every donation being celebrated, and every flamboyant house you see may represent funds meant for roads, drainage, ambulances, and other public services, diverted by the very crooks you worship and celebrate."

[John Doe @AnasJoomary]

@stehoare @adamkeys_ Yep, you "think" but the officials confirmed otherwise. I bet they're more qualified and unbiased to be interpreting the rules. They're right and you're wrong.

[Fan_Monty @AFC_Monty_]

Oh the fucking beautiful irony. 😂

[Aliyu Mustapha @Sir_elmusty]

As I wrote last weekend:
"Every car being flaunted, every donation being celebrated, and every flamboyant house you see may represent funds meant for roads, drainage, ambulances, and other public services, diverted by the very crooks you worship and celebrate."

[Sam @ilynem]

Manifesto? Let’s see what was in Tinubu’s 2023 manifesto.
1. 12% GDP growth? Fail.
2. Stabilising Naira at 300 per dollar? Fail
3. 15,000 MW and constant power? Fail
4. Triple spending in Education? Fail.
5. Raise healthcare budget to 10%? Fail.

No one cares about your manifesto

[shaka ⚡️ @shxkxbabu]

the hazard that went a whole year in the premier league without scoring a goal. 29 games 0 goal.

he also had just 2 goals in in the UCL KO stage. yamal had 6 at 18

why are you acting like anyone broke a sweat while playing against hazard?

[.. @BodegaaCat]

Dan Ballard flipped konsa over and fell and u guys said it’s a penalty

[shaka ⚡️ @shxkxbabu]

hazard played 14 games against arsenal in the epl and he scored just 4 goals (3 penalties btw 🤣)

salah scored 11 goals against us and you don’t see liverpool fans making noise

take your hazard nonsense elsewhere, nobody rates him.