GOOD MORNING EVERYONE.
Please I need honest opinions on something because I’m genuinely confused if I’m being too nice or just being taken for granted.
I met this guy here in Lagos. We’re from the same place, he’s way older than me, not family, we just happened to connect here.
Out of respect, I offered to accommodate him temporarily while he hustles and gets his own place.
At the beginning, everything was respectful.
Anytime he wanted to bring his girlfriend over, he asked for permission. It was occasional, mostly Sundays and she’d leave early Monday.
I agreed because it felt reasonable.
But slowly, things started changing.
The visits became frequent.
Then overnight stays became normal. Then it got to a point where I’m not even informed anymore. I’d come back home and meet them already settled in my room.
Now this girl goes to work from my house every morning and comes back in the evening.
She works in a Chinese company that already provides accommodation, her luggage is still there, yet my space has quietly become her base.
They sleep on the floor of my room, using my bedsheets. I do all the cleaning and washing alone.
I don’t even bring girls over out of respect, but that respect hasn’t been returned.
Recently, on her birthday four days ago, they made a framed picture of her and hung it in my room. I had to privately ask him to remove it. Since then, her attitude toward me has changed, which tells me the conversation was probably shared.
What hurts more is this: this guy is not broke. He does POP, wall screeding and painting.
He recently bought a new phone, new clothes for her and sponsored her trip to her village in the far North during Christmas.
The money spent on all that could’ve gotten him a space.
This is not how I expected things to turn out, especially from someone older than me that I tried to help.
So I’m asking honestly:
Am I wrong for feeling uncomfortable?
What would you do if you were in my position?
At what point does kindness turn into being taken advantage of?
I really want genuine thoughts🙏.