Anna Bixby

[Jim Geraghty @jimgeraghty]

"But a goal will not count if a player is offsides."

"When is a player offsides?"

"Whenever anything exciting happens."

[ESPN FC @ESPNFC]

As the smallest nation ever to play in the World Cup, Curaçao leaves the biggest stage after stealing all of our hearts 🫡🇨🇼❤️

The tiny Caribbean island country scored against Germany and took a point from Ecuador. See you at the next one 👏

[Quinn Nelson @SnazzyLabs]

would you like to add protein to your $21 salad for just $9 more

[jxke. 🧸🎰🃏 @cantguardjake]

“You can always spot Americans in foreign countries”

Yeah man you blend right in at Yellowstone with your child’s medium Armani Exchange shirt, skin tight capri length jorts, and Pumas

[Neil Renic @NC_Renic]

Wow, what a stressful week of work. Time to relax by holding a phone beaming endless streams of horrific international news inches from my head

[bro @scrungeonmaster]

can’t even knock on wood these days. that’s why it’s all going bad. “knock on laminated particle board”. go fuck yourself. that’s insane

[seth | sunny 18 @pqdres]

Arguably this is more accurate today than it was in 2007

[victoria 🫶🏻 @litttlesnappy]

praising jesus because a rapist was elected is why i don’t go to church anymore

[Scarlet Astrorum @ScarletAstrorum]

You don’t have community because you aren’t a good community member. You don’t host events, you don’t know how to cook, you don’t know how to dance, you don’t know how to sing, and you aren’t doing anything to learn. You can’t tell stories or jokes.

[Pop Crave @PopCrave]

Harry, Zayn, Niall & Louis of One Direction release joint statement paying tribute to Liam Payne:

“We’re completely devastated by the news of Liam’s passing. In time, and when everyone is able to, there will be more to say. But for now, we will take some time to grieve and process the loss of our brother, who we loved dearly. The memories we shared with him will be treasured forever. For now, our thoughts are with his family, his friends, and the fans who loved him alongside us. We will miss him terribly. We love you Liam.”

[trin @lovelltrin]

transgender operations on illegal aliens

[Iowa Hawkeye Wrestling @Hawks_Wrestling]

Spencer brings home silver 🥈

#Hawkeyes x #Paris2024

[Lindsay Gibbs @linzsports]

This was always the end game of the anti-trans hysteria in sports -- that all female greatness in athletics will be diminished and challenged and asterisked. Everyone in the "Save Women's Sports" transphobia crowd is directly responsible for this.

[Richard @gamray]

Just absolutely sensational