Ann Calsbeek

I don't want to live in a hole anymore, and I'm going to do something about it -Fantastic Mr Fox

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Don't ask how I found this photo, but it's a pretty accurate depiction of my adult life

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Dunno why I have to say this in 2022 but STOP BUYING FROM AMAZON

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Gandalf has used the word "fool" so often that no one takes him seriously anymore. No choice but to befriend the so-called FOOL

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Crystal ball is aNgRyY

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Pippin has had a lot of green dragon exposure, maybe just a straight-up joint(?) and thinks that the crystal ball is a good thing to touch

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Oh man, I've been out here calling them "bros" and I think Tolkien just understood true male friendship. Tolk-bros! Toke bros forever.

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Pippin and Merry absolutely crushing the pub vibe STILL. Wait, are they the real bros here? #greendragon

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Saruman wanted to be big boi wizard so bad but now he's fish food

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Pippin in his prime: salted pork, longbottom leaf, mushies, tobacco, a taste of victory...

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Merry and Pippin have been eating so many boomers at this point

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Turn of the King!

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Tree Wars! Greta has spoken, Gandalf the White is following her on Twitter, Saruman is about to eat all of the nasty orc smoke and vape cartridges he's ever put into the air!

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Sorry I only just arrived: Legolas and Gimli... Body count... BROS

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Woah, these theatre orcs are in for it! They were just hoping for some musical improv but now they have to bring the battering ram out

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Orcs come to Helm's Deep to put on a cute show but random old man accidentally shoots one of them so...bad blood

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

HALDIR! BEST BRO!

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Legolas is thrilled! Bros back together! Team fortress fight ready...set..GO!

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Eowyn loves the *idea* of a man who gets owned by a wild boar, not the actuality

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Theoden says "Where was Gondor" so many times it could be a TikTok dance

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Legolas thinks Aragorn is ded and bro group is broken! He fought the leader of the Uruk-Hai but he couldn't handle a pig/wolf hybrid! rip

[Ann Calsbeek @AnnCalsbeek]

Eowyn doesn't know where her horse girl future will lead but she believes in herself