Brooke Eisen

frequently repeats stories. frequently repeats stories.

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

My cats didn’t wish me a happy Mother’s Day :(

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

I was next to Stanley Tucci at a red light a few weeks ago, and it has since become my entire personality

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

@jessi_fuchs @jessi_fuchs I hope you get one!!!! 😭

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

I need to say something that is controversial, yet brave; the new Velma show is good.

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

to all movies over 3 hours long-
who gave u the right?

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

Raise your hand if you left your chipotle chicken pasta leftovers in the car all night instead of bringing the box up to your fridge but are still considering eating them regardless 🙋🏻‍♀️🙋🏻‍♀️🙋🏻‍♀️🙋🏻‍♀️

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

No one:
Me: Did you know you live walking distance from a super gnarly murder site?

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

my AirPod fell in the cat litter goodbye forever

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

My boyfriend has been watching Drag Race with me, and today he texted me this with a photo of his cat I’m so proud 🥺🥺🥺

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

Just because you can hear the 10 min All Too Well (Taylor’s Version) coming from my car does not mean it’s an invitation to wave me down at a red light and try to sing along

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

All that budget and they couldn’t get Rachel McAdams a decent dye job!??? Or wig?????

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

My sweet dumb cat keeps trying to bring toys into the litter box and then is sad when they’re ruined

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

The absolute gall of google maps to tell me to turn left on Olympic..

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

I feel okay living in a world where people know more about Spider-Man than geography

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

I was getting an oil change this morning and filling out forms for it and the guy asks my last name. I said “Holland, like the country” and he goes “HUH??? The what??” and looks at me all weird so I repeat it & then he goes “OHHHH like Tom Holland??”

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

No one:
My Pilates instructor: “For those of you asking, this is The Cheetah Girls’ Christmas album we’re listening to!”

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

Someone please go to Chili’s with me

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

I blasted Welcome to New York in my AirPods as I landed in New York and it was the vibeiest vibe that has ever vibed

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

me when the Pilates instructor says I need to “sit taller”

[Brooke Eisen @aPancakeParade]

Thinking about how I used to live in the two most embarrassing states in the US