𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃

currently accepting applications for someone to make my decisions ♡

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

imagine being a squirter in the 1600s and they call u a witch

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

Would you say hi or keep scrolling? 👀

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

Who’s still awake? Come say hi 🤍

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

they’re going to put tariffs on dryhumping next

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

Not everyone can handle this level of confidence.

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

on the couch being gorgeous and evil

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

A little mystery, a little confidence... the rest is up to your imagination. ✨

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

men invented pool tables so they can watch each other bend over

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

What's the first thing you'd say if this showed up on your feed? 👀💬

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

if you don’t like being kissed on the lips don’t be such a great friend

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

One emoji to describe this photo. Go. 🩷

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

giving him the ol’ jfk (messy head in the backseat of my car

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

Okay, serious question... what's the first thing you noticed? 👀👇

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

(asking to cuddle) can we 99

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

Looking for a reason to check my messages. 👀

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

Be honest... rate the fit from 1–10.

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

missionary so i can ask him if im bad at overwatch

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

I can’t flirt but I’ll awkwardly giggle at everything you say

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

when i'm all whiny and needy and they talk to me real sweet

[𝐻𝒶𝓏𝑒𝓁𝓎𝓃 @AppleHazelies]

i want a little e boyfriend 😔