Ariel Elias

Threads: ariel_comedy
Bluesky: arielcomedy

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

Hey I'm funny over on Threads (ariel_comedy) and Bluesky (arielcomedy). It's been fun

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

https://t.co/noXxTw0FPz

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

Come to a show, talk to me afterwards if you want. Tell me about how you saw that crazy video. It's honestly my favorite thing in the world. I'll see you out there.

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

My venus fly trap caught three flies. It's just so nice to see someone do what they said they were going to do.

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

https://t.co/oMhoN0oYZm

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

Bachelor party made a mistake

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

https://t.co/oMhoN0oYZm

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

New York City this Saturday

@dinahashem_ @MartinUrbano @AnthonyDeVito_

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

Get tickets:
https://t.co/alDNhEJQNC

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

Cool show alert! This Saturday at @caveatnyc with @AnthonyDeVito_ @dinahashem_ and @marti

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

https://t.co/alDNhEKoDa

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

Nerds rejoice. I'm hosting a game show based around Venn diagrams @caveatnyc 9/14

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

Some people say the key to a successful marriage is communication, but it's actually keeping your mouth shut when they send you anything from the Internet that you already saw two weeks ago.

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

Vacation is a time when every part of you can relax except your bowels.

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

The party bus lobby must be so strong. You're not allowed to ride in a car without a seatbelt, unless you're drinking and dancing on a pole. What an incredible loophole.

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

I watch more than a modicum of garbage trash TV, which surprises some people because I use words like modicum.

[Josh Gondelman @joshgondelman]

Kristi Noem: No one will top my bizarre animal killing stories.

RFK Jr.: Hold my bear.

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

RFK jr trying to lock up the woman vote by finding the weirdest way possible to choose the bear

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

I know I'm in Colorado because the guy who picked me up from the airport told me he liked me because I'm quiet.