Ashton 🐻

🫄 = literally me

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

Offended at how much my belly jiggled when I ran up the stairs then

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

Nothing says 'british summer time city toilet' quite like pubes on the toilet seat and the stench of BO

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

It brings me everlasting joy to know how shit our local Evri service is since I left 😁

[DA VINKI @VorosTwins]

do you ever just go

🤢🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮🤢🤮🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤮🤮AI Art🤮🤮🤢🤢🤮🤮🤢🤢🤮🤢🤮🤮🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮🤢🤢🤢

but then

💓💓💞💗🩷🩷💕🩷🩷💓💓💞💗💓💕💓Real Artists making real art💕💕💗💓💓💓💞💓💗��🩷🩷💕💓💓💕 💓💓💕💓💞💕🩷🩷💓💗💓💓💕💕

[nyx @aaronrrey]

i lost my job chapstick n now my car chapstick is in my work bag n my room chapstick is in my car n everything is just a fucking mess

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

This video is so funny, I've literally watched it like 20 times and it's still funny 😂😂

[Minga @KillaMinga]

The pure aura on this video is insane

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

No feeling worse than breaking the speed limit to get somewhere on time only to find out the person your meeting is late 😂

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

No but why am I the most senior member of the IT Support team and I'm 2 months in 😂

[☔ @Whotfismick]

accidentally became important at work

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

@Key_Mathias Going on a bear hunt ass response

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

Imagine, you're an Asda driver, you're driving up to someone reverse parking, you're doing next door, what do you do.
Do you:
A: Wait patiently for them to finish parking
B: Wait and then drive past when they're at least out of the road
C: Drive behind them and stop them parking

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

If you answered C you would be correct, why the fuck would they cut behind someone who's reversing into their driveway and then park in front of it???? I'm so confused and angry, brother get out of my way

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

Imagine, you're an Asda driver, you're driving up to someone reverse parking, you're doing next door, what do you do.
Do you:
A: Wait patiently for them to finish parking
B: Wait and then drive past when they're at least out of the road
C: Drive behind them and stop them parking

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

Want to talk to someone that really believed the world would end on the millennium, how did you feel on January 2nd?

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

MY CAR IS FULL OF SHIT I DON'T WANT IN MY CAR BUT ITS TOO FUCKING COLD TO UNLOAD IT

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

@Key_Mathias Yoooooo

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

The idea that someone's pen of choice has blue ink makes me sad

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

Used 20 out of my 30 minute lunch break making everyone else tea, why am I so fucking dumb

[Aaron 🦇 @aaronfraggle]

It's on Tubu. It's literally on Heebee. It's on Poodee with ads. It's literally on Dippy. You can probably find it on Weeno. Dude it's on Gumpy. It's a Pheebo original. It's on Poob. You can watch it on Poob. You can go to Poob and watch it. Log onto Poob right now.

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

Kids in public toilet
"Jack, you havin a poo bruv?"
"Nah"
"Is it a nice poo?"
"Yeah not gunna lie"

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

Me leaving the work group chat like

(My manager is called Jackie)

[Ashton 🐻 @Ashton1607]

GOAT customer review