A young woman went to the famous Dr. Jones for advice on how to enlarge her very small chest.
The doctor told her, “Every day after your shower, throw your hands in the air and say, ‘Scooby doobie doobies, I want bigger boobies.’”
She did this faithfully for months — and sure enough, she eventually filled out a perfect D-cup!
One morning, she was running late, hopped on the bus, and suddenly realized she’d forgotten her ritual. Panicked, she stood up, raised her hands, closed her eyes, and proclaimed, “Scooby doobie doobies, I want bigger boobies!”
A man seated nearby leaned over and asked, “Excuse me… are you a patient of Dr. Jones?”
Surprised, she said, “Why yes, I am! How did you know?”
He winked and whispered, “Hickory dickory dock…”
When one of the most respected referees in world football is refused entry by the host nation, because they don't like his home country, the correct response of the other referees should be to boycott the tournament unless he is allowed to do his job. Sadly, that won't happen.
Hi Russell, considering I am the only Labour Councillor on the authority and I was not at the induction (as I have been here 9 years), this is a complete lie and a breach of standards @reformexposed
Fiona Bruce, "I've heard Reform UK say that they'd get rid of benefits for people with mild anxiety, what % of welfare bill does that make up?"
Former Conservative now Reform UK, Danny Kruger, "I don't know"
Fiona Bruce, "So how do you know it will save you £10 billion?"
*audience laughs*
Danny Kruger, "I don't know every fact and figure"
Fiona Bruce, "You've just given us £10 billion and you have no idea how you get to it"
Danny Kruger, "I can stand that up later if you like"
“The real divide is that we have 50 families in the UK that have the same wealth in total as 50% of the population.”
Green Party co-deputy leader Rachel Millward on why Britain cannot overcome division without tackling inequality #BBCQT.
Rachel Millward, "The country has never been more divided, and that is heartbreaking isn't it"
"It's horrible seeing hate rise in our communities"
"The real divide is that we have 50 families in the UK that have the same wealth as 50% of the population"
"That's a massive elephant in the room and the reason why so many people voted Green yesterday, because we're the only ones actually calling that"
"Until we look at that great divide where the super rich get richer and richer and richer, and the rest of us, the 99% are struggling on the daily"
"When everybody's standard of living is affected, then people start scapegoating, they start pointing fingers, they start pitting us against each other"
@azzaroo242@txbamxnmicxh_s And the other 40% will struggle with the cost of living, on account of struggling to get to work because they need 5 hours in the morning to figure out how to tie their laces
Piers Morgan, "If we discovered last week that Keir Starmer has taken £5,000,000 without declaring it from a crypto billionaire in Thailand, Reform UK would have gone absolutely berserk" @piersmorgan 👏
Robert Jenrick, "We're talking about a gift even before Nigel Farage was a member of parliament"
Fiona Bruce, "But you know you have to declare it in the 12 months before you become an MP"
@ScottishPower
We recently moved house, and submitted final meter readings, the bill is in my partners name. You provided us with a bill for estimated readings. We spoke to your customer support team, as you were asking us for £850! For one months electricity!
@elenchus878@AdamsAVFC@HLTCO But it won is the game😂 I don’t think anybody cares whether you consider him a genius or not, we only care that we win games… like the last 11 in a row. I’d focus on how your own teams doing pal