Asking For A Friend

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

Does anybody out there even care? #askingforafriend

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

Ladies spend time and money making themselves beautiful. Then, use a Snapchat filter that makes them look like a dog. Why? #askingforafriend

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

Is the cell phone the new phantom limb? I won't have it anywhere near me. But, I'll still feel it vibrating in my pocket. #askingforafriend

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

How am I supposed to feel about the fact that my 11 year old son's poops are bigger than mine? #askingforafriend

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

Is dust really made up of skin cells? If so, we can probably reanimate at least three people here at the house right now. #askingforafriend

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

I'm about 98% sure that something just crawled out of my butt. For reals. What should I do? #askingforafriend

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

@huntsbergerjunk - Two great appearances on podcasts today! @ARIYNBF and @DougLovesMovies

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

Am I the only one who stares in the mirror and says, "Yeah. Go ahead and have another donut, fat-ass."? #askingforafriend

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

Do Asian girls really have sideways pussies? #askingforafriend

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

If you come across a dead body while trying to dispose of a dead body, should you tell anybody? #askingforafriend

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

How do you say "butthole" in Spanish? #askingforafriend

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

Is it okay to say, "I like my coffee like I like my titties, full of milk."? #askingforafriend

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

How secretly happy is Bill Clinton that his wife lady lost the presidency? #askingforafriend

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

How do you get liters of blood out of hardwood flooring? #askingforafriend

[Asking For A Friend @AxingForAFriend]

How do you tell your friend that his wife needs to wipe better? #askingforafriend