Chris Keating

He only had blank lines to say
But he said them in a witty and stylish way.

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

Myself and my very dear and talented friend have started a little comic book project in memory of a friend of ours who passed unexpectedly nearly three years ago.
Not in a crash.
Heart attack.
These scenes are at the start of the story when we find him reincarnated as a...

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@moranless It's Morrissey.

He has an incredible back catalogue and he'll always throw in the odd Smiths tune every now and again.

The people who complain probably only have You Are The Quarry and Strangeways in their CD collection.

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@foolish_big In her folly age
In the foliage
Mrs. Foley aged considerably...

I've just given ye a FABULOUS intro to your next single. It could be Big Boy Foolish's Eleanor Rigby.

Or not.

I'll get my people to have brunch with your people and we'll thrash out royalties and stuff.

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@TheNotoriousMMA President me hole.
Cop yourself on, ya fucking punch drunk coke fiend.

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@andyhersh Typical 'Pool fan.

Football season is over so now you're giving out about tennis.

I'll join ya when Wimbledon kicks off...

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@NiallFarrell218 @rtenews They couldn't build a motorway between Cork and Limerick but you expect this prick to rule the waves?

Me bollocks.

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@rtenews I'm saying stuff.

Important stuff.

Nothing at all to do with how shite I am at being Taoiseach of Ireland but I'm hoping that by me spouting stuff about shite important stuff you'll think I'm a viable politician.

But I'm actually a shite politician.

And a fucking dope.

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@tomhappens The Fontaines are a fine band.

They remind me of The Fall but that's just a comparison created out of utter laziness.

But they are an incredible album band.

Which reminds me of how The Smiths were an incredible album band.

The Smiths and The Fall is all I gots, man.

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@simoncoveney @OfficialCorkGAA Should we expect you as a panelist on The Sunday Game soon?

A lot you know about hurling.

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@gavreilly @VirginMediaNews There are FIVE opposition parties????

Well, I never...

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@BowesChay Booby trapped?

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@OffgridIreland What about the thick looking fucker who was walking holding up a poster of Trump, Putin and Cokey McFuckface?

Is that acceptable to you?

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@NickiDonohoe This popped up on my Facebook memories today...

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@Colly_wobbles @RoyalFamily The Royal Beard is a tradition for Royal males who go bald.

Baldness was viewed as being because of a lack of testosterone so bald princes and kings would grow beards to prove they were still 'all man' even though were baldy as fuh.

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@impartiallens @BowesChay Not the only pub, mate. Other pubs refused them as well.

We like to keep our Cork pubs scrote free.

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@BowesChay Too fucking right too.

The scum are targeting The Long Valley. But, fair play to other pubs that did the same like The Sin É and the other heritage pubs.

We're Cork. We do things different here, pal.

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

If you're doing Pana this week, pop into The Long Valley and get yourself a drink and a sandwich to say thanks to Peadar and Paul and the lads for refusing to serve the right wing scum that paraded through our town on Saturday.
And the Sin É and the other pubs that did the same.

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@StevieGrainger Hamas Andwich.

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@RobertKennedyJc What's your narcotic of choice today, Mr. R.F.K.?

I don't know if you're aware of this but, tweets like this, coming from a democratically elected politician, proves that
a) You're a spaced out fucking idiot
And
b) The people who voted for you are spaced out fucking idiots.

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@EOBroin I am seriously of the opinion that there is a distinct lack of determination to actually build fucking houses in Ireland AND I include the opposition in this opinion.

I believe it's just a huge fucking game of political football.

Imagine if the government got it right..

[Chris Keating @BadgerLyons]

@EOBroin There are people living in rodent and mildew infested homes as it is.

Here's a fucking mad notion.

Sort that situation out first before you start bleating on about derelict properties.

In my opinion, your call to make these properties available 'in 12 weeks' is blowholing.