Bae Bitch

I don't do what I'm supposed to, so no bio. You'll just have to read my tweets. Yahoo IM: @baeberetta Tumblr:

[Bae Bitch @BaeBitch1]

I am wearing
Socks that match
Today
Obviously this means
I have superpowers
Unknown
I'll let you know
When they manifest
Stay tuned

[Bae Bitch @BaeBitch1]

Coal in my stocking for me
And for @Night_Errant?
We'll see!

[Bae Bitch @BaeBitch1]

Give me Ritalin
Or give me death
Seriously
Get me the Ritalin
I'm not accepting death

[Bae Bitch @BaeBitch1]

Dear Taylor
Could you please
Get your ass over here
Right now
I have a case of the sleepies
I really need to
Shake it off

[CATE Mrs.DGAF @MistressMental]

duct tape
toilet paper
blankets
glitter
hand cuffs

Things in my trunk.

[DrunjAF @DrunjAF]

I love my wife. She's my soulmate. Ladies, don't bother with anymore raunchy DM's.

*turns to wife*

See that honey? Now put down the knife.

[The Bacon-Nate-or @bacon_gillepic]

Mom: I can't wait to see you for the holidays Honey
Me: me too!
Mom: oops wrong number
Me: well played

[Bae Bitch @BaeBitch1]

@JoshontheGo Aww, thank you! You are so sweet. :)

[Cheeky Poetic Bitch @deedragonhunter]

When you indicate a right,
but then take a left,
what you are signaling
to the world is that
you are a moron.

[Bae Bitch @BaeBitch1]

Brewing coffee so strong
The hair it grows
On my chest
Will be that of greek gods
You're warned

[Bae Bitch @BaeBitch1]

All good things
Must come to a beginning

[Cheeky Poetic Bitch @deedragonhunter]

Unconditional.
A word so delightful,
that even the word love,
loves it.

[Nope. @Miz_Mental_Case]

Turkey
Or
Chicken?

YOU MUST DECIDE!

[Nope. @Miz_Mental_Case]

Oh, Christmas tweet
Oh, Christmas tweet

How lovely
Is thy format.

[God is Tricksy @AdrianYoung10]

The older I get the dunker I feel.

Strike that. Reverse it.

Put bells on it and drag it around a field naked.

Getting carried away now.

[Nope. @Miz_Mental_Case]

All I want for Christmas
Is my 2 retweets
My 2 retweets
Yes, just 2 retweets.

[Nope. @Miz_Mental_Case]

Reviving
Unfathomed
Decisive
Effects

[Nope. @Miz_Mental_Case]

I think I'm paranoid
(does the robot)

It's complicated.