I sprayed over ā¦500,000 on stage because a Fuji musician called my name and hyped me up.
My colleague gave him my name and my company name from the crowd.
He called it out on the microphone and started singing my praise.
Something entered me immediately.
I was in full Agbada. I felt powerful. I felt seen.
I started transferring to the money changer. Collecting mint notes. Spraying without counting.
The musician kept going. I kept spraying.
When they moved to the next person I walked back to my seat feeling like a champion.
That was when I checked my phone.
Five transfers. ā¦100,000 each.
ā¦500,000.
My body calmed down immediately.
I left that party quietly.
Those musicians dey use juju ehn. Nothing wey anybody won tell me. š
@Hybrid_Ola IMO, flirting with people other than your partner is a disrespect to your partner and in fact yourself. Plus she was aware about his by numerous disrespect and disregard of her, of course her self esteem will deflate.
Should I be honest?
⢠Having money in my account makes me happy
⢠Having people around me who care about me makes me happy
⢠God reminding me, even in the storm, that He loves me makes me happy
⢠Seeing my siblings happy makes me happy
⢠Living a simple life and being surrounded by positive energy makes me happy
⢠Food makes me happy
⢠Watching interesting series makes me happy
⢠Listening to music makes me happy
⢠Buying clothes makes me happy
⢠Dressing up makes me happy
⢠Being in a good space mentally makes me happy
⢠Cleaning my space makes me happy
I rarely taste my food while cooking, I cook entirely on confidence and vibes so the finished product is always a surprise to me as much as it is to you.
If you eat my food and something is wrong, please know that I am also a victim and we are in this together.
2023, I missed my convocation. I missed my induction. I donāt have a single group picture with my lecturers or the people I graduated with. I couldnāt go for NYSC I didn't celebrate anything I couldn't afford it.
Iāve never really ādone lifeā the way people assume. I didnāt go on my first date until this year never been to the beach, never been to the cinema, never really had fun. Everyone looks at me when I say these things.
Before that, a lady once offered to take me out because I told her I had never experienced it. She didnāt mind paying I even said I don't have money to come down to the island, she said she will order an uber. I felt uncomfortable, worried, even scared. I chickened out and said no I felt like a useless man, I couldn't afford shit.
Not because I didnāt want to go, but because something about it just reminded me of where I was financially.
Then this February, I finally went on my first date. I paid for everything. Spent money I normally wouldnāt.
So when people say āmen should stop faking maturity and celebrate themselves,ā it sounds nice, but itās not the full picture. A lot of guys are not avoiding joy. We just donāt have the leverage for it.
Most men in Nigeria are broke. Thatās the reality. Not lazy, not unwilling, just financially constrained. We miss moments, not because we donāt care, but because we canāt afford to show up for them.
This might be the 1st year Iāll actually celebrate my birthday the way I want, and Iām doing it properly. Iāll go out, hit the beach, enjoy myself this time. Not because I suddenly became a different person, but because I finally can. I also celebrated Valentine's Day for the first time. Documenting everything is fun when you have money to pay for it.
A lot of us want to celebrate with friends and family. We want those memories. We want to show up fully. But poverty quietly takes those moments away and replaces them with survival.
Thatās why Iāve always tried to position myself to help people break out of it.
Because poverty is deeper than money. It steals experiences, confidence, and even the ability to enjoy life.
God bless the women, that came into my life šš I can finally say afford to do things.
HR: We lost the new hire today.
CEO: What happened?
HR: He resigned after his first week.
CEO: That makes no sense. We doubled his previous salary.
HR: Yes, but salary was not the issue.
CEO: Then what was?
HR: You asked him why he left at exactly 5:00 p.m. And why he left the office before you did.
CEO: I was just trying to understand his mindset.
HR: He understood it clearly. He felt the company was not paying for his work, but for control over his time.
CEO: But commitment matters.
HR: So do boundaries. He finished his work, met expectations, and left on time. But instead of that being seen as professionalism, it was treated like a lack of loyalty.
CEO: People should not rush out of the office.
HR: He was not rushing out. He was simply leaving when the workday ended.
CEO: Still, it did not look right.
HR: That is exactly why he left. He realized very quickly that even with better pay, the culture expected presenteeism over performance.
CEO: That is unfortunate.
HR: Yes. We offered him double the salary, but also gave him a preview of a workplace where leaving on time becomes a character issue.
CEO: So what are you saying?
HR: If employees are judged for having boundaries, then no amount of money will make them stay.
A higher salary can attract people. But if respect for time is missing, it will not keep them.
For context: I didnāt have any close friends for 3 years. Many of my previous friends were miserable, loved to gossip and eventually betrayed me. I promised myself I wouldnāt make any new friends until I stopped being a people pleaser, raised my standards for friendships & felt comfortable being my own friend first.
Now my friends are completely different from the type or women I once called friends. Every time I see them I feel so refreshed and grateful that I waited long to choose the right people into my life rather than settling for unhealthy friendships again. The younger me wouldāve never imagined these types or friendships to be possible.
There are women who will talk for hours without gossiping even once about other people. They talk about their goals, their interests, their fears, their routines, their past, their desires, but not a single moment do they talk about others.
I did not think this was possible. I did not know healthy women who avoided gossip existed, but they do. It truly is so refreshing to talk to someone for hours about life & not once need to mention others in the conversation.
Let me use this opportunity to shoot my shot.
Iām a masters degree holder in statistics, graduated with Distinction.
Iām married and blessed with a child, however things took a bad turn for me when I lost my means of livelihood.
As a result, Iāve not just having
I have a co-worker who never announces anything. You donāt know she applied for a promotion until sheās already in the new office. You donāt realize she bought her own place until she casually mentions āheading home to finish painting.ā She doesnāt post milestones. Doesnāt crowdsource opinions. Doesnāt invite commentary.
I used to think she was secretive. That success was supposed to be shared loudly. That excitement needed an audience.
Now I see it differently.
She moves with intention. Quiet. Focused. Certain. Her plans are protected while theyāre still fragile. Her joy isnāt diluted by outside noise. She lets things grow roots before she shows the world the bloom.
It isnāt secrecy. Itās discernment. Itās peace. Itās self-trust.
Sometimes the strongest people are the ones who build their lives softly, without applause, and let their results speak when theyāre ready.
i once worked with someone extremely wealthy and what stood out was their mindset and how they never complained about small inconveniences
their coffee order was wrong? they just drank it. flight delayed? they pulled out a book.
they had this quiet acceptance that some things simply arenāt worth the emotional energy while the rest of us stressed over what we couldnāt control, they had already shifted focus to what they could control.
it wasnāt really about money solving problemsā¦
it was about having enough security that they didnāt feel the need to fight every battle... they could afford, mentally and emotionally, to let things go.
You canāt outspend a woman thatās in love, unless she no guide.
āBabe,I saw this and you came to mind immediately,so I thought to get one for youā
āBabe,remember that your white kaftan? I just got you a very fine purse to go with itā
āBabe,please stay close to you phoneā¦a rider is going to call youā
āBabe,do you like Guinea fowl? I just placed an order for one to be delivered to you tomorrowā
āBabe,do you like this wristwatch?ā
āI got you a customized jerseyā
Women dey spend, weāre not just as loud as guysšš
now take this information and flip it. constantly pointing out the things you are grateful for can train your brain to notice more things to be grateful for. constantly noticing abundance will train your brain to notice even more abundance. flip the script & stay in control.