Will Shakespeare

Poet, playwright, actor, and upstart crow. The man who put the 'I am' in iambic pentameter. Jack of all trades, master of pun. (historical RP)

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

Some stuff about me, in case you're interested: https://t.co/mqNJjfL2vb

Don't bother with the comments. I'm definitely not Edward de Vere.

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

@terezam5 ((Kit's writer and I have both been having a real time of it IRL unfortunately! I'm an essential worker so I've had no brain cells left over for RP all year))

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

@theregentking U WOT M8 I'LL HAUNT U

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

Tom Nashe strikes again

[Whores of Yore @WhoresofYore]

Word(s) of the Day: “Butter Whore”

[Whores of Yore @WhoresofYore]

Word(s) of the Day: “Poperine Pear”

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

I'd love to defend myself here but I spend too much time in Southwark alehouses to be even slightly convincing.

[Philippe de France (indefinite hiatus) @LeSeulMonsieur]

The British are quite useless. And also, they have terrible wine and food. And they smell.

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

"What up I'm George I'm 54 and I never fuckin learned how to read"

[George II @HanoverSwag]

I dont kno how 2 read and i Refuse 2 learn

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

@theregentking I'm already the prettiest girl you know 😘

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

it me

[Whores of Yore @WhoresofYore]

Word of the Day: “Word Pecker”

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

@theregentking ...DAD?!

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

One of mine 👀

[Whores of Yore @WhoresofYore]

Word(s) of the Day: “Grope for Trout in a Peculiar River”

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

@HanoverSwag @MarlovianSass @theregentking Best not to ask tbh

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

It's my birthday!

...and also my deathday, but we don't talk about that.

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

I've met a few girls like that in London.

[UberFacts @UberFacts]

When a male llama tries to make a move on a female llama, she'll spit on him if she's not feeling it.

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

@MarlovianSass I didn't know they made a doll of you

[UberFacts @UberFacts]

"Gay Bob," one of the first homosexual dolls ever made, was released in 1978. Esquire awarded the toy the “Dubious Achievement Award,” and toy sales were steady throughout the year.

Gay Bob even came in a box that looked like a closet.

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

Happy birthday @MarlovianSass! I've written a short poem for the occasion:

Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Thou art ridiculously hot, and I go all pink and useless when you're there.

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

@MarlovianSass I won't forget your opinions on the bloke upstairs, don't worry.

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

*throws a snowball at @MarlovianSass*

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

@MarlovianSass It's a figure of speech, you wally.

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

@MarlovianSass Thank god for that.

[Will Shakespeare @BardlyWorking]

@MarlovianSass *cheerful* I know I don't.