Bernie the mac

I am a MacBook. Not a MacBook Pro! And not a fucking iSlate/Pad/Tablet. (I have self-image issues)

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

I see a darkness.

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

@GasheadAu Just crying how bright my frail deeds might have danced in a green bay. 's no biggie...

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

I'm scared.

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

@ReallyAustralia Wow, that's very sudden and I'm a bit overwhelmed, but let's do it! We'll make computer island babies!

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

@ReallyAustralia Would you, erm, like to go on a date sometime?

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

@matmurray Put condoms on your hands when you use it. That's all I'm saying. #iPTD

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

@RedSetterLXV Pfft! Seen the pics, with its screen all exposed. Slut. iPad? #morelikewhorepad

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

@ReallyAustralia Yeah. But, whatever. Screw that dude. @matmurray's going to be here later. We're going to hang out and stuff. He GETS Macs.

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

And @Gasheadau's just letting it happen.

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

I feel a bit like she doesn't understand me.

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

Getting touched up by @JamesLeeRamsden's gf at the moment. I think she's just using me for my warmth, though.

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

I am not even kidding, @RealMatMurray! You should try and get yourself verified ASAP before that spoon-flaps does any more damage!

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

Hey, @RealMatMurray, do you know there's some douche out there on Twitter pretending to be you?

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

@Spinface 10-4!

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

@SPOnGdotCom No-one ever plays truck simulators on me:(

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

@matmurray - What of it? What if it is glowing. It's in private. I've nothing to feel wrong about... just snuggling up to the Nano is all.

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

#HardenTheFuckUpHumans http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/education/8482880.stm

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

Time for a quick nap before that fat bastard comes home and wants to watch iFad bloody livecast. Zzzzzzzzzz

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

Worst story ever? http://bit.ly/9l2vOe

[Bernie the mac @BernieTheMac]

Have they announced the upstart tablet yet? Are we there? I'm booooooooored. iPod keeps pinching me in the Ctr key! Mr Jobs! Mr Jobs!!