I hope he’s able to be honest and open about what he does behind his partners back and maybe one day I’ll get an apology who knows? I have even attempted to reach out to clear the air but I was blocked. Maybe they will take accountability like I have one day idk.
I cared deeply about. He was just at the bar recently making out with a friend of mine and the friend is a mutual and this friend looked at me several times never said hi and I hear stories about how my ex pup is trying to flip a narrative. Well here’s the other side to that
I didn’t want things to potentially end and then we can’t be friends or whatnot but I realize now that yes I had my part in this. There were times I gave up, times I might of hurt them because I didn’t do what they wanted. I felt defeated and destroyed by someone
They didn’t just do this with me but they do it with others and to know I was lied to about someone and hear their similar story it makes me realize how I was manipulated and hurt by someone I cared about. Multiple times I asked not to do the pup stuff
I can’t say I don’t miss them I miss the good stuff the stuff that I was blamed for and even when I attempted to change the things they wanted from me it was never good enough. Talking to his ex which is the 1/3 of the triad that left initially I realize how much this is them
I was beaten down so bad mentally it was like a reflex to know when we got done messing around and I went home he was going to destroy me via text. He never liked anything I did no matter how I tried. He still to this day probably assumes he did zero wrong.
I was told to never share them with anyone or post them which also made me feel like shit or some secret. I would always be pressured into sex, and if I didn’t do it the exact way my pup wanted I would on the way home hear about how it was awful and I could do better why didn’t i
Not because I didn’t want it I loved him so much but I felt this glare anytime I did anything with my pup. Could have him come to my house without his partner at all. If we did lunch we had to come right back, so the sneaking around really was awful for me. We also took videos
I even went to go make a tag for his collar and I even included his partner saying “love and cared for by x and x” he said I can’t say love??? I was never able to tell my pup I loved him infront of his partner. I felt weird when my pup would want to hold my hand.
As his sir/handler I wanted to name them ect ect I was told every time I ran a name by his partner he didn’t like it. He never liked anything I did honestly. It came off like he did all this so his last partner he had wouldn’t walk away like the other did
He wanted. We would have to sneak around to do sex stuff and I honestly felt awful but I was also afraid to loose someone I had such a strong connection to for 14+ years. After while I got him to calm that stuff down. Now here’s where his partner made me feel awful
To do these sexual acts and if not my pup would be upset so I did want to do thing with them but on my terms where I was comfortable and not being made to feel like I was just some sex object. Yes I was his sir but I never felt as if I had control at all and this is what
My pup who said he wants to be the sub would always want to push things further. When his partner didn’t want us fucking around we would go to parking lots and I would come over for lunch but his partner didn’t know about the parking lot blow jobs. I would be pressured heavily
I’ve never been the most sexual person I’ve pushed myself in life to post pics or talk sex because I did want those things but due to past trauma and scars I had not dealt with it made my sex drive abysmal along with my diabetes sadly doing the rest of the damage.
So fast forward to him finally permanently living here I got so excited for them to be so close. We wanted to hangout a lot but his partner didn’t want me around all the time this is my ex pups words. Also we were told we can’t have constant sex. Now….
One of his partners left their dynamic and instantly he tried to make me hate him and the information I was given at the time I really felt bad for him. Later on I found out that I was being manipulated but we will get there
We always had so much fun watching movies on discord with one another talking nerdy stuff and talking sex stuff. He was in a triad at the time and I came and met him a few times before he moved here permanently. He would stay for a couple weeks with his partners that lived here
I don’t know if I’ll ever have another pup again. My last pup really really hurt me and they take zero accountability on our dynamic. I knew them for 14+ years and they finally moved to my area a few years ago literally less than 20 minutes from me with their partner.