Carel

Crazyboy, Fear Factor SA Winner, Multisport Athlete, MC, Smile Foundation Ambassador and a Dutchman......

[Carel @biginRSA]

I say no to alcohol, it just doesn't listen...

[Carel @biginRSA]

I used to have super powers but my psychiatrist took them away.

[Carel @biginRSA]

I got sacked from my job as a bingo caller, apparently, 'A meal for two with a terrible view' isn't the best way to announce number 69.

[Carel @biginRSA]

Google: I know everything.
Facebook: I know everyone.
Internet: Without me, you're nothing.
Electricity: Keep talking fools.

[Carel @biginRSA]

I hate people who say age is just a number.....age is clearly a word.

[Carel @biginRSA]

I've got a problem with my new phone. I told the shop assistant there's an app on it that makes me look fat. 'It's called camera" he said .

[Carel @biginRSA]

If money can't make you happy, you won't like poverty either.

[Carel @biginRSA]

I'd just like to stop the rumors . . . I don't have a dirty mind. I have a sexy imagination!

[Carel @biginRSA]

I don't know about you, but a highlight of my childhood was talking into the fan to hear my robot voice.

[Carel @biginRSA]

Now that the dog has dug up all the May flowers, I'm ready for summer.

[Carel @biginRSA]

What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing they just waved . . .. Did you sea what I did? . . . I'm shore you did . . . Beach!

[Carel @biginRSA]

I hate it when people in a commercial have more fun in 30 seconds than I will ever have in my whole life.

[Carel @biginRSA]

I love it when I buy a bag of air . . . and the company that manufactures it is kind enough to put 3 chips inside. Thanks I appreciate that!

[Carel @biginRSA]

As I watched the dog chasing his tail, I thought "Dogs are easily amused." Then I suddenly realized I was WATCHING the dog chase his tail.

[Carel @biginRSA]

"Why is there a piece of cheese on the TV!?" "Grandma please! That's Spongebob!"

[Carel @biginRSA]

I may be schizophrenic, But at least we have each other.

[Carel @biginRSA]

That beautiful moment when you see your food coming at a restaurant... And it ends up going to the next table.

[Carel @biginRSA]

Nothing ever works out for me. The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest.

[Carel @biginRSA]

My chief contribution to society is being "The Worst Case Scenario."

[Carel @biginRSA]

A mate of mine recently admitted to being addicted to brake fluid. When I quizzed him on it he reckoned he could stop any time....