Unofficial QB beer chugging times:
Tom Brady (w/ Colbert): 2.71*
Matthew Stafford: 3.61
Mitchell Trubisky: 4.05
Patrick Mahomes: 5.27
Aaron Rodgers: DNF
* = left a little bit in the cup
@sabermetrics
MEETINGS are destroying the planet. Primitive weirdos forcing people to drive across town to sit in a room and breath each other’s pheromones when they could have telecommuted.