Brooklyn Jowers

Always late, but worth the wait.

[Brooklyn Jowers @BooklanPage]

We're all just trying to be happy.

[Tori_ @Toribabieegirl]

Pro tip: If you can smell yourself a little bit other people can smell you alot

[Shane Jerominski @AccPharmacist]

Patient: Can I get three boxes of that 96 count non-drowsy Sudafed?
AP: Sorry sir, I can’t sell three boxes at a time.
Patient: Why not?
AP: Because the government doesn’t want us helping people make that non-drowsy Crystal Meth.

[James @CaucasianJames]

not gonna put too much pressure on u guys but i think some of u need to clean ur microwave. u don’t have to do it tonight but i’d do it in the next few days

[Caroline Orr Bueno, Ph.D @RVAwonk]

This is wildly untrue. Not even close.

(It’s heart disease, if you’re interested. Followed by cancer. Followed by COVID.)

[Ed Litton @EdLitton]

Behold the man upon a cross
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed, I hear my mocking voice
Call out among the scoffers
It was my sin that held Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished

[hi can u pls help me find hibiscus la croix? @blanseypants]

It’s hard to relate with Euphoria because at my high school we had Drive Your Tractor to School Day

[Adventures of an Ambivert ✨💫 @thatdamnbrook]

Free them

[Kristi Yamaguccimane @wapplehouse]

The Taco Bell drive thru at 1 am will have a $200k Mercedes S65 waiting right behind a ‘96 Cavalier that’s never had the oil changed followed by a moped ridden by three people. All craving the same thing: to Live Más. Truly the last great melting pot of class in this country.

[B’michelle 💚 @Bmichellebeauty]

ATTENTION PLEASE‼️‼️ Hey everybody , my little cousin Aniyah is MISSING ! she’s around 5’1/5’2 & she’s only 14. She was last seen last night around 8:00 pm on REDAN RD. She was wearing these Christmas pants & a grey sweater. SHE IS NOT FROM GEORGIA 🥺 & she doesn’t know anyone

[UT Martin @utmartin]

Happy holidays from UT Martin! #TheOffice #HolidayVideo

[Dr. “Dad” MD, FAAP, FASN @DrRayMD]

I’m on call this Christmas, but my dad registered as a “student shadower” so that he could spend part of the holiday with me. 😊

[2000s @PopCulture2000s]

it’s time to bring this back https://t.co/HTKyDMm35l

[CNN @CNN]

Betty White turns 100 on Jan. 17 and is inviting fans to celebrate with her in a special movie event called "Betty White: 100 Years Young — A Birthday Celebration." https://t.co/VEEh4uW1Mi

[Variety @Variety]

Betty White’s 100th Birthday Celebration Is Coming to Theaters https://t.co/bUbIOWLUIr

[Patrick Doran @lunch_enjoyer]

My student loan payments start on January 31st 2022, even though I have already made plans to suddenly go missing on the 30th

[Karan Menon @TheKaranMenon]

The Omnicron variant is just another example of how COVID will be prolonged if rich nations and Big Pharma keep blocking vaccine distribution.

[Be A King @BerniceKing]

“Nobody’s standing here.” Jane Elliott

[Cobain JMG @JMGarciaXII]

That was a flex LMAO

[ava 🇵🇸 @wownicebuttdude]

girls don’t want a boyfriend girls want the $600 dyson cordless stick vacuum