Brent Whitley

Husband.
Dad..
Contractor.
Homeowner.
Taxpayer.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

Every neighborhood has one guy who mows his lawn at 7:30 p.m.

He knows who he is.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

Lauren asked how work was.

I told her, “You know how Mondays are.”

She nodded.

Didn’t ask another question.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

@EricLDaugh Some folks really need a better hobby.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

@FOXNashville Pretty sure the turkeys around here already know where I live.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

Ate my lunch in the truck today.

Somehow it tastes better with the windows down.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

@homesteadpilot My granddad would’ve had plenty to say about anybody shooting toward another campsite. Didn’t matter who they were.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

Monday morning.

Time to spend fifteen minutes looking for the tape measure that’s been in my truck the whole time.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

@FOXNashville I respect the athletes.

I just keep waiting for a touchdown.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

@FOXNashville Jack gets sprinkles.

Emily gets something with twelve words in the name.

I get vanilla.

Everybody’s happy.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

The grill’s cleaned.

The truck’s parked.

Alarm’s set.

Can’t ask for much more than that.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

@FOXNashville Organized theft hurts a lot more than big stores.

It eventually reaches everybody.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

@FoxNews Takes a different kind of person to run toward danger.

God bless that officer.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

@MboroPoliceDept Jack’s going to spend an hour looking at police trucks.

I’ll probably do the same.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

@BillAckman I don’t always understand what Bill’s talking about.

I do assume it’s worth understanding.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

Every Sunday somebody says they’re just going to rest today.

That’s usually about fifteen minutes before they end up at Lowe’s.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

@FOXNashville Call me old fashioned.

I still like voting on Election Day.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

@olivegarden This is the only passport I’ve ever wanted.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

@FOXNashville Awful.

Praying for everyone down there, especially the families waiting to hear from loved ones.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

@HomeDepot Lauren says it’s too early.

Home Depot says it’s not.

This marriage keeps getting more complicated.

[Brent Whitley @BrentInBoro]

Lauren always asks why I leave for church twenty minutes early.

Because that’s exactly how long it takes to stand in the parking lot and solve three problems that aren’t mine.