Frog King 3000

oh no

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

Got caught Shazamming a song at the bar.

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

@EricJen06537486 Highway great. Highway overpass? Even better.

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

Anyone got eyes on slugger? It’s his birthday and I can’t find him anywhere. Happy birthday Slugger!

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

Happy Father’s Day to the guy honking the train horn 10 miles away at 1:32 AM

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

@CorbinCarroll5 Interesting. I wonder how this will effect the trout population.

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

@RodgersLord It would be inappropriate to leave it out

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

feeling ghoulish, might commit tax fraud tonight. The IRS can send agents but they won’t find me. I am the lizard. I am the lizard

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

They say will be here soon enough. Better batten down the hatches as they say

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

Why do I eat corn if I just shit it out completely intact? I’ve spent thousands of dollars on corn. Such senseless waste

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

The covenant have taken Reach, and brother, it’s staring to rain.

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

How do you refuse to believe in the moon landings? Have you always been woke or did you first realize it when you were kicked in the head by a horse

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

I had a nightmare about the X-men again. I’m so fucking scared of the x-men.

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

In 5th grade I pissed in the stairwell when no one was looking and got away with it. The only reason I did it was to see if I could. I’ve been chasing that high for years now. Pissing on Tom Cruise was a close second. He’s not as fast as he seems. And he’s really short.

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

@jackgilman08

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

Trump this, Biden that. Can’t a man just return to the primitive state and gather berries in the woods?

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

Trump this, Biden that. Can’t a man just watch football and forget about the world for 5 fucking seconds.

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

Feeling my way through a dark cave, hand to the wall. Rock closes in all around. Suddenly a light in the distance. I trudge my way deeper within, chasing the ethereal light. The rocks give way to a massive chamber filled with candles. It’s a Travis Scott burger.

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

@dentroid69 DENT DENT DENT

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

@gabedorrell @lucasdorrell19

[Frog King 3000 @BullocksJohnny]

disaster: finally made contact with an alien but he just keeps trying to finger my asshole. I’ve made it abundantly clear that I don’t want his finger anywhere near my ass yet his persistence suggests he simply doesn’t care about MY needs in OUR relationship. feeling like a whore