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Listen up 5's, a 10 is speaking

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

Limp Bizkit doom scrolling: Keep scrollin’, scrollin’, scrollin’, scrollin’

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

One time my autocorrect changed Bon Iver to Bob Iver and I can’t help but belly laugh every time I think of it.

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

I’ve never met an Indian girl named Tina in real life and yet there is always one in every Bollywood movie.

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

Never met a bigger heartbreaker than Ohio sports

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

Hate when I start jamming out to a song on the radio only to realize it’s the Christian rock station

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

Will never understand how white people think that plain white rice is an acceptable accompaniment to a meal

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

Excited to see Kamala’s White House fashion lewks 💁🏽‍♀️

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

A perfect YouTube comment under Juvenile’s “Back Dat Azz Up”.

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

Does anyone else think that most of the cast of Too Hot to Handle is actually not too hot to handle?

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

Came through [home from the hospital] drippin [in COVID] drip drip

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

“But I stilllll haven’t founddd what I’m lookin for” - me on my quest for the perfect sandwich

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

And thus commences the season of getting shocked by everything I touch ⚡️

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

When life isn’t going well I think to myself “well at least I already got my bangs phase out of the way”.

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

Yeezus is King

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

Watching recipe videos: “Ok..yup..I can do that..have those ingredients..mhmm..dafuq is aquafaba?..an immersion blender?..NOPE I’m out.”

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

The best high I’ve ever experienced is when a song you’ve been hoping for plays on the radio when you’re driving with the windows down. It just hits different than manually selecting it to play.

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

Is watching YouTube videos about the benefits of turmeric a hobby? Because that’s all I seem to do for fun these days

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

I bet when The Weekend wrote the song “I Feel it Coming” he did not intend it to be the song that I sing when I’m anticipating a bowel movement.

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

Wake up, anxious
Post up, anxious
Ride round in it, anxious
Flossin on that, anxious

[$ @BumpkinFrowns]

Forget which Sex and the City character are you, I’m without a doubt a George Costanza.