The Ham Man

double cheeked up on a thursday afternoon

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

She M all Night til I Shyamalan

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

When I was in elementary school I wrote an essay that had to be "2 pages double spaced" and I wrote an entire essay with two spaces between every word then had to go back and manually delete all the spaces

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

Ah yes, I love drum & bass! My favorite DJ is uh, *checks notes* Bastille.

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

Making dinner

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

@fatfatpankocat Never enough ham either, side or entree

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

Might be time to make a comeback

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

@oscarmayer Ham

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

An Italian Fred Flintstone yelling "Yabba gabagool"

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

The dudes who are down bad page but it's just people saying no to my aggressive attempts to sell them ham

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

Mfs posting their Spotify Wrapped but can't SPOT a good deal on ham IF I WRAPPED it like a present

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

Every breath you take
And every move you make
Every bond you break, every step you take

~i will simp for you~

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

If you go vote today, I'll give you a special deal on ham

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

@ladygaga Come over. I have an exciting deal for you

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

"you see, it's not about the money for me. Providing my customers with 2 sopping wet hams at the low price of $20 gives me joy. Turns me on, you see. I barely make a profit on the $20, but that warm, fuzzy feeling inside? Priceless."

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

Not me googling how to spell bourgeoisie every time because i can never get close enough for autocorrect

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

My ass after guzzling ham for 3 meals a day

[J Λ M Ξ S @jamesglynn]

50,000 litres of wine down the drain in Spain

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

@enormousbitch @SUBWAY 🍖 🍖
🍖 🍖
🍖🍖🍖🍖
🍖 🍖
🍖 🍖

🍖
🍖 🍖
🍖🍖🍖🍖
�� 🍖
🍖 🍖

🍖 🍖
🍖 🍖 🍖
🍖 🍖
🍖 🍖

[The Ham Man @Buy2HamsCMU]

@CourtneyEkstrom Chocolate muffins go well with ham...or so I've heard