Cabsel

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[Cabsel @Cabsule]

Do you think anyone in a wheelchair has threatened that they were going to kick someone’s ass?

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

A ton of people have told me that they’re going to Bangladesh. I want to know who this Ladesh is and what their secret is.

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

The quickest way to remove plastic from the oceans is to ask the Kardashians to come ashore

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

If our flaws are what make us beautiful then I want you to know that you’re breathtaking.

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

Do lesbians have a nut allergy?

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

I like to think of that time when you know you’re about to barf as loading chunks

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

One of these days John Cena is going to say “you can’t see me” to a blind person

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

I’m so good at swimming I put the pee in pool.

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

If you are what you eat wouldn’t that make eating anything cannibalism ?

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

Auctioneers are rappers without musical talent

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

Any stairway can be a stairway to heaven if your bones are brittle enough.

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

I don’t get why people never tell me if they’re mute.

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

Why do guys buy stress balls? They have some built-in.

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

We need to start calling custody cases “family feuds”

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

The scariest escape room is one with the lights out and Lego’s all over the floor

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

Jim Carey became a furry when he played the role of the Grinch

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

My favorite body builder is Dr. Frankenstein

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

Michael Jackson had kids so he was a dad-hee-hee

[Cabsel @Cabsule]

Knee pads are just knee caps for your knee caps