Caitlin

On the pursuit of awesomeness, excellence is the bare minimum

[Sarah Cooper @sarahcpr]

Breaking: Trump says he cannot release the results of his Covid test because they are under audit

[Richard Blumenthal @SenBlumenthal]

I will oppose the confirmation of Judge Amy Coney Barrett, as I would any nominee proposed as part of this illegitimate sham process, barely one month before an election as Americans are already casting their votes. Americans deserve a voice in this hugely consequential decision.

[Caitlin @CaitCavs]

Yeah we all do stupid shit like drinking all of our parents’ alcohol and smoking too much weed. Sane 17 year olds don’t go on into a crowd of people and start murdering them.

[The Hill @thehill]

Trump Jr. on alleged Kenosha shooter: "We all do stupid things at 17" https://t.co/C37Q8ASqqW

[Public Citizen @Public_Citizen]

Ted Cruz voted to pass a $740,000,000,000 military budget two weeks ago. That's $2 billion a day, every day.

[Eugene Lee Yang @EugeneLeeYang]

Mr. President, we aren’t watching you or Tiger King because we actually like you. It’s because you’re godawful, delusional, megalomaniacal train wrecks with terrible hair.

[Matthew Chapman @fawfulfan]

Four presidents were assassinated. https://t.co/2Xfp6C8476

[Caitlin @CaitCavs]

Yo I’m in this bar chillin, dancing, having a good time. And this motherfucker decides to PISS on the bar wall, directly next to me. I paid $20 to get in this bitch. Keep this nasty degenerate shit in the frats

[Caitlin @CaitCavs]

Okay @adobecare where are you?? All of this to close an account and administer a refund. At this point I’m in too deep and my stubbornness won’t let me hang up

[Caitlin @CaitCavs]

Older folks wonder why millennials don’t pick up the phone to call for things anymore. Well, I was told my hold time would be “greater than one minute”... first of all, what?? Here I am, still on hold.

[Todd 'Papi' Carlos @TheToddWilliams]

JAMES BLUNT: You stink

JAMES TACTFUL: I bought you this perfume

[Caitlin @CaitCavs]

Enough is enough we need to get this bat shit crazy lunatic away from any and all power involving our country. How these type of tweets are allowed to fly and don’t lead to his immediate impeachment baffles me. Enticing a nuclear war on TWITTER?! That is not a strong leader. https://t.co/zGcWsK74QT

[Donald J. Trump @realDonaldTrump]

North Korean Leader Kim Jong Un just stated that the “Nuclear Button is on his desk at all times.” Will someone from his depleted and food starved regime please inform him that I too have a Nuclear Button, but it is a much bigger & more powerful one than his, and my Button works!

[Zack Fox @zackfox]

I got this giraffe painting from a yard sale and my gf asked me to "freshen it up a bit"

[Caitlin @CaitCavs]

My brain just shit itself a lil https://t.co/bzzojKrt3A

[Caitlin @CaitCavs]

I often catch myself turning my brain “off” for days at a time, almost forgetting who I am and going through basic motions of living. My simple goal for 2018 is to feel more alive and present every day, to get more in touch with who I am and who I can grow into

[Caitlin @CaitCavs]

How I feel going into a new year now after thinking that every other new year of my life was going to be extraordinarily different https://t.co/clJKWNj6Lr

[Chris D'Elia @chrisdelia]

2018 is gonna be MY year! #HappyNewYear

[Caitlin @CaitCavs]

So creating ONE Disney movie is forcing LGBTQ on everyone’s lifestyle? Just don’t go see it, bro. https://t.co/nGSCsKq8Q8

[Caitlin @CaitCavs]

I loved watching Real Housewives for shits & gigs until I got another serving job. Now I come home after doubling 12 hours waiting on rude ass people & scream FUCK YOU at Teddi who claims to know the real value of a dollar after growing up a millionaire in Hilton Head

[Caitlin @CaitCavs]

@brittybrat123 I MISS YOU TOO damn I need to come out to Jeff City more or something

[Caitlin @CaitCavs]

I’m one Trump tweet away from a mental breakdown