Calvin Chadima

Here for a good time, probably

he/him

[Sera Koulabdara @SeraKoulabdara]

YES

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

@ColeHuedepohl Maybe I'll build a deck

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

yeah okay

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

The worst part about being in isolation for Covid is not being able to kiss your homies goodnight

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

Boy I sure do miss the thrill of making regrettable life choices on the daily

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

Who wants to be my quarantine gf?

We can talk all the time and slowly start to develop feelings for each other, then after the quarantine is lifted we can hang out for the first time and realize that we never actually liked each other, we were just lonely and wanted attention

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

DS download play is socialism

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

Listening to Pete Buttigieg talk is like eating a salad with no dressing. Or croutons. Or anything that remotely resembles flavor at all. Actually it's more like chewing on a week-old head of cabbage that you found in the dumpster outside of a cheap Chinese takeout.

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

Doctor: You've been in a coma for the last 24 hours

Me: Oh boy I can't wait to look at the complete results of the Iowa Caucus

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

Sometimes having a family name (George) is cool, but then I remember if I don't pass it on I'm disappointing my entire family and it's actually fucking terrifying

[Peter Lande @PeteTheG33k]

I made it onto the harder Christmas card three times and I’m very proud of this.

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

My mom was an anti-vaxxer, I had my mid-life crisis at 6 years old. Honestly how am I still alive???

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

Money is really cool cause you can do stuff like impulse buy things on Amazon at 3am in hopes that the item will bring you a fleeting sense of happiness before your life returns to an existential crisis

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

I just don't get it

If I go to a hardware store for hardware, and a grocery store for groceries, then why would I ever visit a dollar store???

I already got dollars, like I just don't see the point

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

@realtombush Bruh if your volume is at 2 can you even hear the music?

Even rule though

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

A guide to volume numbers:

Is an even number- Is pretty cool, you're listening to music the right way

Ends in a 5- Not as cool as an even number, but it's okay

Is some odd number, but isn't prime- You can do better

Is a wack ass prime number like 43- You're a sick bastard

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

Midichlorians are the powerhouse of the jedi

[Calvin Chadima @CalChad]

This year really be on that last lap of the lego star wars podrace level type shit

[Chris Ray Gun @ChrisRGun]

Complaints about porn rewiring your brain, brought to you primarily by people who genuinely believe that a hippie who was stapled to a tree in Skyrim times will hang with them in the hyperbolic time chamber if they never cum.