Captain Ramen

If i was a forklift, I'd be the Toyota Class V High-Capacity IC Pneumatic

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

Don't prepare for things. Purchase what you need.

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

I don't trust anyone who has iron on their coal belts.

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

I like to imagine every person has their own personal 2 or 3 guys named Bill they have to pay each h and every month, and in return, this council of "Bill's" allow them to live and have warm water.

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

My dreams of becoming the next pope have been ruined.

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

If I had the money, I'd buy youtube and fully endorse/reward bullying the skibidi toilet kids

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

Theres too much milk

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

I want to give a sizeable stack of cinder blocks the people's elbow from the 3rd story.

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

Life has been so much better after starting my new diet. I like to call it my "daily dose of orange." This entails consuming anything that is either orange in flavor and/or color.

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

The Britta in itself is my water cup.

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

I dislike pooping while drunk

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

I will not bust in my @adidas sweats

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

Can I borrow your hamster?

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

It's so much easier to not plug your phone in and let it die

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

Constantly checking the tracking number on your package isn't going to make it come any quicker.

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

found it.

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

Ok, where in the FUCK is my phone?

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

I promise I won't manipulate you :)

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

Why does milk go from whole to 2%? What the hell happened to the other 98%???

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

Salutations, my children. Are you ready for your daily dose if smooth jazz?

[Captain Ramen @CaptainRamen3]

The African Lore Anime tiktok page is better than most other animes I've ever seen.