Captain James Kirk

James Tiberius Kirk in his completely uncensored glory. Starfleet's favorite man-whore.

#StarTrekRP Parody Account.

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

Captain's Log, impressive as always.

Word has reached the Enterprise of a conflict on Tynnara. This #WarOnTynnara may be crucial for Starfleet to resolve for more than just my exploration of @SharaTheOrion's nether regions.

We are proceeding at MAXIMUM warp.
#StarTrekRP

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

@SarahPalinUSA @TheGornUSA Not the female liberals, as your article clearly states.

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

@MULTiVersesNews @SharaTheOrion I knew if I bided my time eventually the opportunity would present itself.

[Mark C. Sulzbach @MarkChristop]

@CaptJamesTTKirk Please Support @manuintiraymi https://t.co/7IoVLPFlC4 @TheCircuitMovie at https://t.co/NgMVHCDMil
#WeAreTheCircuit
#Retweet

[Matthew DeCapua @mdecapua1]

@CaptJamesTTKirk Cap'n! The captain on my new Trek-inspired scifi comedy webseries desperately wants to be you: http://t.co/uRma624cPp #LLAP

[Trunks Briefs {Base} @PurpleHairdHero]

@CaptJamesTTKirk hi

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

Bones? *gives @LEX_LUTHOR_NO1 a lookover* I think your wig has fallen off, McCoy.

[Lex Luthor @LEX_LUTHOR_NO1]

@CaptJamesTTKirk For god sake Jim!!!!!

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

Just as I told @_MorboTNN, what I said about @SharaTheOrion could very well be true.

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

"It's a far better place I goto... a far better resting place, than I have ever known."

@TheRealNimoy: To your continuing voyages.

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

#CaptainsLog: Spock has taken sick leave, meaning no science officer. Not that we need one, although nobody else can get off the bridge now.

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

#CaptainsLog: While it's an amusing notion, I'm afraid their will be no female captains in Starfleet. A captain's uniform requires pants.

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

Captain's Log: The @SoundwaveMalik-tribbles have a new home, though what @MandoMedic will do with 72, 6-foot tall, fluffy apes I can't say.

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

The @SoundwaveMalik-tribbles CAN replicate. Had Chekov crate up 72 of them, mailed the fluffy red things to his medical contact: @MandoMedic

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

Interesting discovery: taking a child of 5 to a bar is beneficial to scoring with alien chicks.

Who knew?

Almost makes me wish I had kids.

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

Now 5, David Marcus is a swirl of questions. Carol insists I spend time with David, but I'm not sure what to do with him.

We went to a bar.

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

I got David Marcus to stop calling me "daddy". Told him his dad is who knocked up his mom. That confused him. He's not Starfleet educated.

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

Having Spock make @SoundwaveMalik think he's a tribble may've been bad. I saw him sliding on a ceiling purring. Only hope he can't replicate

[Captain James Kirk @CaptJamesTTKirk]

Ever since Spock got that pager, he's more into texting than performing his duties.
RT @Iam_Spock: ( Paging Dr. Thredson )