Charlie Malay

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

I know everyone has read “give a mouse a cookie. But has anyone ever read “give a mouse an eightball”

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

My favorite past time is coming home for the holidays and pissing off my parents

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

Going into the office is so lame, can’t I just fuck off at my pool all day

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

@DanBilzerian Mask on a zoom call. Hahahahah fucking losers

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

“Spider-Man: No Way Home” Call an Uber you cheap fuck.

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

Girlfriends want a photo in any type of scenario
“Omg charlie get a photo of us on the side of the highway”
“Charlie, wrestle that crocodile I’ll get a picture”
“Charlie hug that jelly fish, you look cute”

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

Haahahahhaha

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

I know everyone has read “give a mouse a cookie. But has anyone ever read “give a mouse an eightball”

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

My Uber driver making small talk:
It’s gonna rain in Seattle this weekend

Me: thank you

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

I love when people are like “I’ll hit you up later”knowing damn well they don’t have your number

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

Mfs be like “Almost Friday” then stay in on Friday

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

@jwh_5 @DKells94 Dill

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

Lolla got me fucked up. I’m calling in dead to work tomorrow.

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

Charlie you’re such an asshole, how do you sleep at night?

Me:

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

Uber prices be crazy these days

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

Goes to a movie
Girlfriend: “let’s take a photo”

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

Chicago slaps. No 🧢

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

@kidkuder He’s in heaven

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

I’m no mathematician but going to bed at 7 am just can’t be good for the soul.

[Charlie Malay @CharlieMalay]

That would be huge if someone stabbed me