Crystal ✨Henry ✍️

Writer. Reporter. Gator grad with a Ph.D in Sarcasm & Tom Foolery. Harnessing white Karen energy for good. she/her

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

Sooo…I did a thing! Cheers to the next chapter of my life with the person I love most in the world…me!

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@elonmusk Yeah you tell ‘em big guy. Real art is…digital drawings that anyone can screenshot.

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@qwoted @USATODAY What's the best way to reach out? The link isn't working

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@queensatwork Hi there! What's the best way to reach out?

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@ask_aubry He’s trying this? In Taylor Barbie Swift’s America? Bold.

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@StripSackLunch I want to pitch you an NIL story. How can a girl slide into the DMs?

[MySA @mySA]

Longhorns QB Quinn Ewers nabs sponsorship deal with Davis Law Firm https://t.co/70DVGqRpt7

[San Antonio Express-News @ExpressNews]

For TV ad, 'Call the 4s' Davis Law Firm joins forces with Longhorns No. 3 Quinn Ewers https://t.co/INqk7n9IGr

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

The way I just KNOW the Backstreet Boys loyalist girlies from my generation are 👀💅☕️ over this Justin Timberlake news.

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@courtneyellis Why did I read that like Jonathon. As if Jogging’s government name is Jogathon.

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@theblaze This ads showed up under this post and I legit thought it was explaining to you to calm down bc he’s still a white man. He’s just a festive white man with genius features.

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@SkinnyTuna

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@fern_breath Would you plz ask him why does he write like he’s running out of time?

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@danacarvey I’m on the Hartman trubute of FOTW 😭💙and my biggest takeaway is that you and your guests are massively kind and supportive of each others work. And also Dr. Evil’s voice was modeled after Lorne. https://t.co/yVIKcDt9Ru

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@JohnWarePT @RedWave_Press @EdKrassen Actually good point. Men are much more mentally fragile. 🤔 that should be considered.

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@notcapnamerica All I know is some decent white women better pull up and infiltrate and take these idiots down. Don’t let them feel safe among “their own people” anymore. Pull up blonde and pale and indoctrinate their kids with banned books. Then get names and doxx em.

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@danacarvey @DavidSpade @AlanZweibel @Cadence13_ @nbcsnl @DavidSpade I’ve been listening to the podcast in the car but yesterday my teenager asked me to stop bc “Ugh I know you just listen bc he’s HOT but can we give it a rest for a bit? Go back to the Barbie soundtrack.”🤷🏼‍♀️ just a piece of meat with no talent

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@meganmargulies Just read to them. Even at 8. eventually their impatience to know what happens next will win out & they won’t want to wait on you to read to them anymore. They’ll take charge. And if they don’t…it’s ok. Neither of mine liked reading at 8. Now I have one writer and one reader.

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@Cooperstreaming No bc what you don’t understand is they have WATCHES ma’am. Watches. Think about it.

[Crystal ✨Henry ✍️ @CHenryWrites]

@KrangTNelson